Cheyenne Quote #117
Quote from Cheyenne in Amnesty
Mateo: So, then I go, "I'm undocumented," and then Jeff goes, "That's why you dumped me?" And I go, "Yeah," and he goes, "Whoa," and I go, "Mm-hmm."
Cheyenne: And what'd he go?
Mateo: He was... weird. He said he didn't know what to do and he just left. I mean, what if he hates me?
Cheyenne: He doesn't hate you.
Mateo: He might. For all I know, he's reported me by now.
Cheyenne: I'm sure he didn't. If he did, then, you know, a bunch of guys in uniform would've busted in here by now all like, "Everyone, down on the ground! Black-bag that guy and throw him in the van." Soldiers would pop out of the ceiling, and just start pounding on you, like, knee to the face, knee to the head, crotch-punch, crotch-punch! And then, you'd probably get sent to Guantanamo.
Mateo: Uh-huh. Probably.
Cheyenne: Man, how weird are sponges?
Superstore Quotes
‘Amnesty’ Quotes
Quote from Cheyenne
Cheyenne: There's a hat rule, "not allowed."
Garrett: Okay, we're not just hatting this. There has to be something in-between maiming someone and putting on a fedora.
Cheyenne: "Employees should avoid discussing racial issues, including positive comments such as, 'I for one am proud of this Mexican's achievements.'"
Garrett: Most of this stuff is stuff I don't wanna do or doesn't even apply. "A female employee's skirt shall start below the knee, and her bosom shall be fully covered"?
Cheyenne: That's a rule?
Garrett: Yeah.
Cheyenne: Most days, I don't even wear underwear, mainly 'cause mentioning that gets me free donuts from whoever's working café.
Garrett: Couldn't you just lie about that?
Cheyenne: They would know. I would know.
Quote from Sandra
Sandra: Uh-oh, hope I'm not interrupting anything. [rubs finger over back of hand]
Jonah: What is that?
Sandra: Sex.
Amy: No, it's not. I think you mean this.
[Amy and Jonah show an index finger going in and out of a thumb/index finger circle on the other hand]
Sandra: Oh, like this?
Jonah: Yeah, there you go.
Sandra: Oh...
[All three keep making the gesture]
Jonah: This is nice.
Quote from Jonah
Jonah: So, I know this may come as a surprise, but I actually got teased a lot in middle school.
Amy: [gasps] No.
Jonah: Yeah, I don't know if it was the rattail or the eighth grade talent show where I did a Bossa Nova rendition of "Material Girl" on alto sax...
Amy: That. It was that.
Jonah: But the moment I stopped fighting it and... and actually just laughed along with them, it wasn't fun for them anymore.
Amy: Mm.
Jonah: They started teasing this fat kid instead, which, long story short, he's a male model now.
Amy: Wow. You're really the hero of that story.
Jonah: I guess so.