Amy Quote #206
Garrett: "Aw, sweet of you to say that." "Well, it's true." "You're very spicy."
Amy: "Special." It auto-corrected.
Garrett: "Sorry, I meant spicy."
Amy: It did it again.
Garrett: "Ha, you're spicy too." "Well, the things is, Kelly, my heart wants a relationship, but my body can't handle one. I'm very ill."
Amy: I don't know. I was just trying to make it seem final, and Emma and I are reading Fault in Our Stars so...
Garrett: "The doctors don't even have a name for it yet." "Oh, my God, I'm so sorry." "I don't really like to talk about it." "No one here knows." "I understand." "Sending you good energy." Ugh.
Amy: Okay. I know this is probably not the right next step, but... what if I tried to get her fired? Or him? Help me, who should I get fired?
Quote from Garrett
Amy: She saw the match before I could get her phone.
Garrett: Oh, okay, we need to Freaky Friday this. You need to find a cursed object, switch bodies with Jonah, have a whirlwind romance with her, but then learn an important life lesson. Switch bodies back.
Amy: This was helpful. Thank you.
Garrett: You're welcome.
Quote from Lady Boss
Jonah: It wasn't why I was doing it, but I really tapped into something here. These guys are really freaked out about the acquisition.
Amy: Yeah, everybody's freaked out. It's a freaky time. Just tell 'em to take it down and get back to work.
Jonah: Ah, but that'd kinda just be like a Band-Aid, wouldn't it?
Amy: Yeah, Band-Aids heal things. Why does everybody hate Band-Aids?
Quote from Maternity Leave
Amy: Sorry, you think that a bath bomb is the answer to all of my problems?
Glenn: It's not a real bomb, and-
Amy: Just kill yourself!
Amy: Kill yourself!
Amy: No, you don't get to talk right now! I am so tired! I have slept 90 minutes in three days. The lining of my uterus is coming out in clumps. I have hemorrhoids so big that my doctor looked at my [bleep] and said "Whoa!" Have you ever had a doctor look at your [bleep] and say that?
Glenn: [softly] No.
Amy: I am wearing frozen diapers so that my [bleep] doesn't fall out. Okay?!
Glenn: I know, I was just-
Amy: Why haven't you killed yourself?!