Sandra Quote #245
Sandra: I can help you figure out if she's with someone. I've been monitoring her social media for months. I print out the good ones, and I put them up on a board.
Jonah: Look, it's fine. Thank you. I... It was just bugging me, you know? Like when you get a tune stuck in your head, and you can't remember what the song is. It's no big deal. Um, have you been monitoring all of our social media?
Sandra: Yep, I even know about everyone's fake accounts.
Jonah: Huh. People have fake accounts? That's weird.
Sandra: Is it, Scott McPhee? Who only follows organic farms and influencer underwear ladies.
Quote from Sandra
Jonah: Okay, I think I have a lead, but it's a long shot. Amy's cousin's ex is following one of "Scott McPhee's" favorite... influencers.
Sandra: Oh, Emma just posted.
Jonah: What? What's it say? What's it say? What's it say? "Having a great time in the snow with my mom and little bro. #FamilyTrip, #HighlnTheMountains."
Sandra: Oh, my God. She's just with Emma and Parker. She's still single. [sighs] Wow. That was scary. [laughs] Look at my hand.
Jonah: Yeah, although I am concerned about #HighlnTheMountains. Do you think Emma's smoking pot again?
Sandra: Who cares? What matters is that Amy's single. Now, here's the plan. You're gonna call Amy and say you want one last special night together. But here's what she doesn't know: I'm gonna poke a hole in the condom.
Jonah: What? No, this isn't... No, no. I'm over Amy, okay? And I'm with Hannah now.
Sandra: Then what the [bleep] have we been doing all day?
Quote from Sandra
Sandra: Three days ago, Amy posted this car selfie. Note the parka. Now, look at the sun reflected in her sunglasses. Wonderland Cabins. That's where she is.
Jonah: Okay, this is um, an invasion of privacy.
Sandra: You think I could follow this trail if she wasn't leaving breadcrumbs? She wants to be caught.
Jonah: Caught... going on vacation?
Quote from Target
Sandra: [to Jeff] Even though we never actually dated, I spent several months telling people we did. And I created these intricate memories of our relationship that feel completely real. And I have these vivid memories of your body on top of me. Your tongue in my mouth. Your hands on my breasts. That kind of thing.
Glenn: Whoo, what a trip down memory lane, huh?
Quote from Ladies' Lunch
Amy: And, um, Sandra, you're still with Jeff?
Sandra: Um, yeah. It's fine.
Dina: It's fine? This is ladies' lunch, Sandra. We need deets.
Sandra: Oh, okay. Um... We spend hours on the phone, just talking. He loves my taste in music. I spend the night at his hotel when he's in town. We make love on silk sheets. Oh, God, he's... gentle and strong. Sometimes he's dark. He took me to the edge of his balcony once and he asked, "Are you afraid?" And I said, "Yes." And he said, "Good. That's how I feel with you." And then we made love. And then we ate dinner. And it was fancy. He thinks I'm prettier than my sister. Yeah.