Jonah: Uh, okay, this is gonna sound crazy, but, do you remember your first period? Because...
Dina: February 4th, 2003. It was a Tuesday. Unseasonably warm.
Jonah: Okay, so...
Dina: I was 19. Late bloomer, though I've more than made up for that since. My gyno says I ovulate like a champ. I drop eggs hard.
Jonah: All right, uh...
Dina: You know my aunt was born with two vaginas? Yeah, she always thought it would help her date, but it didn't. She died alone. Well, she will die alone. She's still alive. She's only like 50 or something.
Jonah: Okay, thanks. Think I got all the information I need.
Dina: [chuckles] God, I'm good at flirting.

Cheyenne: So, the episiotomy is when they have to snip the area between your vagina and your butthole so that you don't tear your pee-hole.
Mateo: You know, it's not working, okay? I'm not getting off this couch.
Cheyenne: And it's all held together by a mucus plug, so imagine, like, a bag of cherry pie filling, but it has a hole in it, but the hole's being blocked by a big ball of snot.
Mateo: Yep, yep, miracle of life. Get it.
Cheyenne: I wonder if I'll eat my placenta.

Amy: My cousin Ricky started out shoplifting. Now he's bangin' out license plates in some prison trying to avoid a big guy named Crazy Eyes.
Julie: Crazy Eyes is a character in Orange Is the New Black.
Amy: Crazy Eyes is a character in every prison in America, ladrona puta.
Julie: Is she okay? I don't understand what's happening.
Amy: It's boxing.