Glenn Quote #203
Glenn: I can't even help my own employees when they need me the most.
Cheyenne: That's not true. You help us all the time.
Glenn: Like how?
Cheyenne: Oh, you want examples? Okay, um, oh, well, we wouldn't be able to come in to work in the morning if you didn't unlock the doors.
Glenn: Actually, nowadays it's all opened automatically by computers.
Cheyenne: Okay, but who turns on the computer?
Glenn: Corporate does.
Cheyenne: Really? That's awesome. Ha.
Quote from Dina
Dina: How about you cool it with the attitude?
Garrett: Not today, Dina.
Dina: What, you think you're the only person that's uncomfortable? My pelvic area is like the Gulf Coast right now. Seriously, I could steam shellfish in these khakis.
Quote from Garrett
Garrett: [over PA] Attention Cloud 9 shoppers. We do apologise for the heat in the store today. The temperature is controlled by Corporate, and we are working on it. And though I am thankful for all of you who have taken the time to tell me that it is hot in here, the next person who does, I'ma have to murder. That is all.
Quote from All Sales Final
Jonah: So... retirement, huh? Got any big plans?
Glenn: Yeah, I think I might finally watch The Queen's Gambit.
Jonah: Okay, so that's... seven episodes. What else?
Glenn: Well, I hadn't really thought much beyond that. Gosh, I guess there's gonna be a lot of hours to fill, huh?
Jonah: Yeah, yeah, but that's a good thing, right, Glenn? I mean, I'm sure you've got hobbies.
Glenn: No, 'cause work is all I've ever known, Jonah. I mean, I started at my dad's hardware store when I was eight, and before that, I worked at the tollbooth.
Jonah: Glenn, I'm sure you're gonna be fine. I- There's gotta be something that you can do.
Glenn: Well, what if I got a 500 piece puzzle? That'd take up some time, right?
Glenn: What, you want me to get a 1,000 piece puzzle? How much table space do you think I have, Jonah?
Quote from Conspiracy
Glenn: I'm sorry. Just... I started doing some research, and I came across this article, "The Truth About Zephra." I think there's some fishy business going on.
Dina: Oh, like tax evasion, offshore banking? What are we talking here?
Glenn: You know how everyone's pushing this 5G? Well, turns out 5 is the worst of the Gs. They say that it hits your brain at a certain frequency that lets them control human behavior.
Dina: You think Zephra's involved in mind control? Okay, that's enough screen time for you.
Glenn: No, it's not that I believe in mind control, but they are trying to control how we greet customers.
Dina: Glenn, enough. This is why old people shouldn't be allowed on the Internet.