Mateo Quote #391

Quote from Mateo in Ground Rules

Cheyenne: Hey, when you were floor supervisor, did Elias always ask to work in greeting cards?
Mateo: Yeah. Don't let him. He reads all the cards out loud and adds the words "in bed." It literally never works.
Cheyenne: Ugh. Okay, thanks. Any other pro tips, let me know.
Mateo: Oh, really? Well, happy to help. I actually miss being floor supervisor. Thanks to ICE, now the only job I can get is making sure Glenn's healthy meals look like ice cream.
Cheyenne: Oh, that sucks. You know you can do that with sushi?
Mateo: A ball of crab on a hand roll. Come on, give me some credit.

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 ‘Ground Rules’ Quotes

Quote from Mateo

Mateo: Another floor supervisor tip: We direct. Don't use words like "maybe" or "I think" with these peons.
Cheyenne: Okay.
Mateo: Before you speak, think, "How would an evil queen decree this?"
Cheyenne: Ooh, yeah.
Mateo: And just a couple other things I thought of.
Cheyenne: Oh.
Mateo: No more campfire games with employees and no sparkly makeup. Oh, and don't put unicorn stickers on your clipboard. They're unprofessional.
Cheyenne: Uh, okay.
Mateo: But otherwise, you are killing it, girl.
Cheyenne: Thanks.
Mateo: Oh, you should probably change your shoes. I mean, they're fun but, it looks like you skinned a Care Bear.

Quote from Cheyenne

Cheyenne: Oh, here's a perfect place to update shift assignments. Hmm. Isaac, you shall henceforth be working on register four to maximize efficiency and expedite expenditure.
Sayid: What's happening? Why do you sound like Nurse Ratched on the Netflix series Ratched?
Cheyenne: Oh, I'm running this meeting like Mateo in a very professional manner. Mm-hmm.
Mateo: Okay, ha, ha, very funny. But you know what? Even this is way better than your usual singles cruise director attitude.
Cheyenne: [British accent] Oh, I doth agree because one should never have a fun, cool attitude when one can have a stick up their arse! [all laugh]
Carol: Oh, my God, that's so good.
Isaac: You're tearing him apart. Do his walk.
Cheyenne: Oh, yeah. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh. That's not how I... [British accent] Uh, uh, oh, God, I right dropped me cane!
Mateo: What cane? I don't have a cane!

Quote from Jonah

Jonah: Sorry about the long bathroom break. I opened the Harper's app and you know how that story ends.