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#Cloud9Fail

‘#Cloud9Fail’

Season 4, Episode 20 - Aired May 9, 2019

After a viral tweet shows how the unkempt the store has become since the staff hours were cut, Amy and Jonah have an idea on how to get more support from Corporate. Meanwhile, Cheyenne, Mateo and Garrett start selling their belongings in the store to earn more money.

Quote from Glenn

Amy: And, also, corporate is asking us to cut hours again. [all groan] Yes, I know. I agree. It sucks.
Marcus: We can barely keep up with everything there is to do now.
Glenn: Yeah, it already looks like the day after the Fyre Festival in here.
Mateo: I said the exact same thing yesterday.
Glenn: Oh, did you really? 'Cause I wasn't in Grocery at the time, so I couldn't have heard you.

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Quote from Cheyenne

Glenn: I can't believe Sandra would do something like that.
Cheyenne: I didn't think she had it in her. I borrowed her car, like, three years ago, and she still hasn't asked for it back.

Quote from Justine

Cheyenne: She's like a rebel.
Justine: She's like a total badass bitch.
Mateo: Oh, my God, is Sandra an icon now?
Justine: She's like a total badass bitch.
Mateo: Heard it both times, thanks.

Quote from Marcus

Garrett: I don't know what I'm gonna do if they keep cutting back our hours. I got bills!
Marcus: I saw this methadone study that pays pretty well, but they said I'd have to get addicted to heroin first. So that's another expense.

Quote from Glenn

Mateo: Excuse me? [scoffs] How do you know it's one of us?
Luanne: Well, all the posts came from the same MAC address, and that device was logged into the employee WiFi network.
Garrett: Who would be dumb enough to send incriminating tweets from the employee WiFi?
Glenn: Well, it wasn't me, because my phone is on airplane mode, and I do not know how to get it off.

Quote from Carol

Carol: Hi. If I know who the person is who was tweeting, who should I tell about that?
Jonah: That's- When you say "you"-
Amy: Are you- Are you saying you do?
Luanne: Excuse me. Who is it?
Carol: Her name is Sandra Kaluiokalani. That's spelled K-A-L... K... It's K-A-L... K-A-L-A, then I think it's "O." It's, um... It's K-A-L...
Luanne: Kalui...

Quote from Marcus

Marcus: There she is!
Glenn: Hey! [applause]
Marcus: [chants] Sandra, Sandra, Sandra, S- [nobody joins in] Ugh, what is wrong with you people?

Quote from Dina

Amy: Okay, uh, Jay, I'm putting you in Grocery. Sandra, we haven't even started the Cosmetics reset, so can you get on that?
Sandra: Got it.
Amy: Okay, Carol I'm moving you off the register, and, Cheyenne, I need you in Jewelry.
Cheyenne: What? Then no one's covering Housewares.
Amy: I mean, if somebody finds a way to shoplift a couch, then they deserve it.
Dina: I get that that's a joke, but in all seriousness, guys, if you do see someone taking a couch, walkie oh-three-five. See something, say something.

Quote from Jonah

Jonah: What do we think happened here?
Amy: Overdose?
Jonah: Ah, Bob didn't even drink. His wife's been flirting with that tennis pro over in Fitness with the big arms and no head. I'd start there.
Amy: I swear, it's like every time we solve one problem, another one pops up. I feel like I'm playing Whac-A-Mole. That can't still be a game, can it? With the hitting animals? Never mind.
Jonah: We're just too understaffed.
Amy: Yeah. No, I-I know. I keep telling corporate, but they just don't believe me.
Jonah: Yeah, because every time they cut hours, we push ourselves even harder to make it work, which they think just proves we never needed the hours to begin with, and so they just keep cutting and cutting until something like this happens.
Amy: Poor guy.
Jonah: He had kids.
Amy: He had kids?
Jonah: Yeah. They've been playing soccer over in Toys and Games for the last three months.

Quote from Dina

Justine: I was thinking of being a surrogate I mean, my womb is just sitting here empty.
Dina: Ooh, highly recommend! The money's good and your nipples get super sensitive.

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