Mateo: Oh. I feel like my insides are crawling through my skin. Can I have a sip of that?
Cheyenne: Sure. 20 bucks.
Mateo: For a sip of Pepto? [chuckles] I'll just go buy my own.
Cheyenne: You know, I think someone already bought them all.
Mateo: Hm. Well, well, well. Who's all grown up?
Cheyenne: It's called war profiteering. I learned about it in Social Studies.

Cheyenne: Why didn't they make it a superhero? You know, 'cause SuperCloud? And it could have, like, a cape or something, and, like, little cloud muscles.
Jeff: Yeah, wow, that's... Clean, it's simple, it's visual, that... is probably what it should've been. Damn. So all right, let's just move on. Here are some words we'd like you guys to pepper in to the conversation today whenever SuperCloud comes up, obviously, so "cool," "millennial," "on fleek..." Have to go back to the superhero mascot, I'm so sorry, that's just a home run.
Cheyenne: Yeah, and he could be saving people with savings.
Jeff: [bleep], that's good.

Jeff: No one is saying you can't ever date somebody you work with. Just be careful not to make unwanted advances.
Cheyenne: So you can't ask someone out unless you know they like you? But then you don't know if someone likes you unless you ask them out, so that's, like, a Catch-22.
Jonah: Whoa, well done.
Cheyenne: Oh, I've been studying for the SATs. It's been a very extrapolatory experience.

Cheyenne: Do you wanna hear my lawyer?
Garrett: Mm-mm.
Cheyenne: "Objection, your honor, he's harassing the witness!" "Oh, that's not a judge, that's a bomb."

Cheyenne: Do undocumented people have documents?
Mateo: No. No, we don't.
Cheyenne: Oh. So, like, won't that be an issue?
Mateo: Yes!

Jonah: What am I supposed to wear to your wedding? The invitation just says, "Not basic."
Cheyenne: You know, not basic. I don't know how to explain it more than that.
Amy: Yeah, like, Adam's wearing a gray suit.
Cheyenne: Mm, I mean, that's, like, semi-basic, but you guys are old. No one's looking at you anyways.

Glenn: "Swam up the Panama Canal." Hey, how long was he a cowboy trick rider for?
Cheyenne: Well, he was in the circuit for a number of years with his horse named... Cloud Tie.
Glenn: Cloud Tie.
Cheyenne: Yeah.
Mateo: And, uh, then he joined the Marines. He was in the... Blue Shirt Division.
Glenn: Okay.
Mateo: At the battle of, uh...
Cheyenne: Khaki Pants.
Mateo: Yep.
Glenn: Like it sounds?
Mateo: Mm-hmm. K-H... K...A-K-I.

Cheyenne: Amy, you're old, right?
Amy: Um...
Cheyenne: Like you were alive during the '90s.
Amy: Yeah, I was. Yep, the roaring '90s.
Cheyenne: So, what would you say would be the best piñata for a Green Day-themed birthday party for a two-year-old?
Amy: Um, okay. Let's back that up real quick. Harmonica's into Green Day?
Cheyenne: [scoffs] I doubt she's ever heard of them. She's two. But it's my mom's favorite band, and it's just easier not to argue with her.
Amy: Wouldn't your mom be okay with something a little more kid-friendly? Like, I don't know, "Minions"?
Cheyenne: She just got out of jail. Minions are criminals. That could suck her right back in to the lifestyle.
Amy: Good point.

Cheyenne: I don't want to do a Green Day party.
Brandi: I thought I asked you to mind your own business.
Amy: This is all Cheyenne, I'm just here for support.
Cheyenne: But she agrees with me, okay? Green Day is dumb. And you know what? I'm not going to college.
Amy: What? Huh? No, we didn't talk about that.
Brandi: Cheyenne, you're going to college.
Cheyenne: No, I'm not. Just 'cause you're my mom doesn't mean that you get to tell me what to do. Right, Amy?
Amy: Um, I mean, in general, that seems true...
Cheyenne: See? She agrees. I'm an adult, and I make my own decisions. And so, I'm gonna buy a motorcycle, or, I don't know, a monkey, maybe both.
Amy: Um, could we just quickly go back to the college thing...
Cheyenne: You don't get to tell me what to eat, either! So if I want to eat peyote, I am gonna eat all the peyote I want. And I'm getting a full-sized back tattoo of the raccoon from Guardians of the Galaxy, okay? 'Cause I love that movie, and...

Mateo: So, then I go, "I'm undocumented," and then Jeff goes, "That's why you dumped me?" And I go, "Yeah," and he goes, "Whoa," and I go, "Mm-hmm."
Cheyenne: And what'd he go?
Mateo: He was... weird. He said he didn't know what to do and he just left. I mean, what if he hates me?
Cheyenne: He doesn't hate you.
Mateo: He might. For all I know, he's reported me by now.
Cheyenne: I'm sure he didn't. If he did, then, you know, a bunch of guys in uniform would've busted in here by now all like, "Everyone, down on the ground! Black-bag that guy and throw him in the van." Soldiers would pop out of the ceiling, and just start pounding on you, like, knee to the face, knee to the head, crotch-punch, crotch-punch! And then, you'd probably get sent to Guantanamo.
Mateo: Uh-huh. Probably.
Cheyenne: Man, how weird are sponges?