‘Amnesty’
Season 3, Episode 15 - Aired March 15, 2018
Amy and Jonah try to get through the awkwardness that surrounds them after everyone saw the video of their kiss. Meanwhile, Glenn and Dina offer an amnesty to employees who admit wrongdoing.
Quote from Justine
Pastor Craig: What's your name, Miss?
Justine: Justine.
Pastor Craig: Well, Justine... I love you.
Justine: I love you too.
Pastor Craig: I love all of you, all right?
Quote from Mateo
Mateo: So, wait, Jeff didn't say anything?
Dina: Why? What would Jeff have said?
Mateo: [laughs] I don't know, he's a liar. I mean, he's always lying about stuff, so...
Quote from Glenn
Glenn: And even Amy and Jonah... you had an affair.
Amy: Glenn, it wasn't an affair, it was one kiss, and it happened because we thought we were about to die.
Glenn: We all thought we were gonna die. You didn't see me smooching the first lady person I could find.
Cheyenne: Weren't you praying to Allah the whole time?
Dina: Yes.
Pastor Craig: What...
Glenn: No, I didn't...
Pastor Craig: Glenn...
Glenn: I am not the one on trial here.
Quote from Jonah
Pastor Craig: You know what, nobody's on trial, okay? Nobody. We all make mistakes. We all have lust in our hearts.
Amy: That wasn't lust.
Jonah: I wouldn't say lust.
Pastor Craig: Well, I'm sorry, I don't know you guys that well. Maybe you're in love then.
Amy: No. We're not in love.
Jonah: No, definitely not love.
Pastor Craig: So you say, but Lord, I'm sensing something going on right here. Y'all feel that?
All: Ooh!
Pastor Craig: Right up there. Y'all feel that? Something good...
Kelly: Great, this again. Woohoo.
Jonah: No, uh, actually, we're... we're dating, so...
Pastor Craig: Oh, uh, tire gauge girl. Okay.
Quote from Justine
Justine: So, do you guys think he should be with Kelly or Amy?
Corey: I'm kind of Team Amy now.
Justine: Yeah.
Isaac: I'm with you. I'm fully shipping them.
Sandra: Yeah.
Quote from Jonah
Jonah: Look, uh, I was just flustered, you know, back there.
Kelly: Yeah, sure. Well, it's very flustering when you find out that the girl you like likes you back.
Jonah: No, no, I just...... everything just got blown out of proportion.
Kelly: Let me ask you this, if... if your crush had timed out with Amy's crush, would we be together right now?
Jonah: Yes.
Kelly: Really?
Jonah: Really. Look, I don't want this whole Amy thing to set us back. I wanna... I wanna move forward with you.
Kelly: Like move in together?
Jonah: Yeah. [chuckles] Why not? I mean, if... if you want to. Do... do you want to? Do...
Kelly: Well, sure, yeah. I mean, I would... yeah.
Jonah: Yeah, great, okay. Cool, then we're doing it. We're... we're living together.
Kelly: Oh. Uh... All right.
[As Jonah hugs Kelly, he sees Sandra wearing a "Team Amy" t-shirt]
Quote from Jeff
Mateo: [on the phone] Chad, it's Mateo. Do... I know I've said some horrible things about you in the comments of your Instagram, but, you know, I can't find Jeff, and I've been calling the office...
Jeff: [walks up] I quit my job.
Mateo: Uh, Chad, I'm gonna call you back. Uh, probably not, actually. [hangs up] Jeff...
Jeff: You wanna get a drink?
Mateo: Sure. Nice shirt.
Jeff: You think? It's the one Matt Damon wore at the end of The Bourne Identity. [chuckles]
Mateo: That's so cool.
Jeff: Right on. I can return it, if you don't like it.