‘The Stranded’
Season 3, Episode 10 - Aired November 27, 1991
After George takes Jerry and Elaine to a party on Long Island, he leaves them stranded there after hooking up with a woman.
Quote from George
Jerry: All right, I'm gonna get this. This looks good.
George: How much is that?
Jerry: $9.60.
George: $9.60? Give it to me.
Jerry: Why?
George: Don't worry, I got it.
Jerry: What do you mean, you got it?
George: I got it.
Jerry: Since when are you treating me to medicine? What are you doing? You're stealing this, aren't you?
George: I'm not stealing it. They owe me ten dollars. They stole from me.
Jerry: You're a lunatic.
George: I have to do this, it's a matter of honor.
Jerry: What do you say to a person like you?
George: Just walk.
Quote from George
Security Guard: Excuse me. What do you got there?
George: What?
Security Guard: What do you got in your shirt?
George: Oh, I was gonna pay for this.
Security Guard: [grabs George] Come with me.
George: Wh- Wh- Where are you taking me? I was gonna pay for it.
Cashier: Um-hmm.
Security Guard: You don't think I remember you?
George: What are you talking about?
Security Guard: I know who you are, I was watching you.
George: What are you gonna do? Are you gonna call the police?
Security Guard: Come on.
Jerry: Can I still buy this or is this evidence now?
Quote from Kramer
Kramer: So, I'm chasing these doves down the street and she's screaming at the top of her lungs, and then when the magician comes back from Europe, two of them turned brown! Well, I followed the instructions! [both laugh]
Steve: [still laughing] Ah, they turned brown! Brown! [talks] So let me ask you something, you know any women we could call?
Kramer: Not really.
Steve: Maybe we should call one of those escort services. I saw one of them advertised before on the cable station.
Kramer: [hands Steve the phone] 555-LOVE.
Steve: Hey, you want in on this?
Kramer: No, I got a girl in the next building.
Quote from Jerry
Police Officer: This your apartment?
Jerry: Yeah, but-
Police Officer: You're under arrest for solicitation of prostitution.
Jerry: Wait a second, I-
Elaine: [enters] I brought you chicken soup. [to Patti] Is that real fur?
Jerry and the Police Officer: [in unison] Oh boy.
Quote from Jerry
George: You had Sgt. Chadway? Me too.
Jerry: He was a nice guy.
George: Oh, great guy.
Jerry: Was there a red-headed guy there?
George: The one with the long sideburns?
Jerry: Yeah.
George: Where does he come off?
Jerry: Yeah, I know. There's no call for that kind of attitude.
George: One of the guys in my cell threw a piece of gum at him.
Jerry: Oh, we all hated him.