Kramer: Eight hours of jingle belling and ho ho hoing. Boy, I am ho'd out.
Ned: Anyone who works here is a sap.
Mickey: Hey, watch it, pal!
Kramer: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Come on.
Ned: Do you know the Santa's at Bloomfields are making double what you are?
Kramer: Double?
Ned: I bet the glue from that beard itches, doesn't it?
Kramer: Oh, you got that straight.
Ned: So when you get a rash all over your face in January do you think Coleman's will be there with a medical plan?
Mickey: Look, you take that commie crap out to the street.
Ned: Kramer, I've got some literature in my car that will change your whole way of thinking.
Kramer: Talk to me baby.
Mickey: Don't listen to him, Kramer, you've got a good job here.

Duncan: There's just no way you could have beaten me by that much. I already beaten you in Junior High School three times.
Jerry: I didn't hit puberty til the 9th grade. That's what gave me my speed. Besides, if I got a head start why didn't Mr. Bevilaqua stop the race?
Duncan: Well, that's what I've always wondered about.

Jerry: George!
George: But I digress. Let me see, now. You were standing at one end of the line and I was right next to you. And I remember that we were even for like, the first five yards and then, boom, you were gone.
Jerry: Did I get a head start?
George: Head start? Oh no, absolutely not.
Jerry: You satisfied? So you see?
Duncan: No, I'm still not convinced and I never will be.

Elaine: [on the phone] Um, yeah, hi, I'd like delivery please to 16 West 75th St. Apartment 2G.
Lew: I know that address. You're Benes, right?. You're on our list. No more deliveries.
Elaine: No. no, she doesn't live here anymore. This is someone else.
Lew: Oh, yeah. What's the name?
Elaine: Why do you need the name? You already have the address.
Lew: We need a name. Give us a name.
Elaine: Okay, okay, Ned Isaacoff.

Jerry: What's the matter?
Lois: I just spoke to Duncan. He said if you don't race, he's going to fire me.
Jerry: What? He can't do that.
Lois: Yes, he can. He controls the means of production. What are you going to do, Jerry?
Jerry: Don't worry, Lois. I'll think of something.

Lew: Ah, I knew it was you! You tried to trick Hop Sing! You are on our list, Elaine Benes! And now you are on our list, Ned Isaacoff.
Ned: You got me blacklisted at Hop Sing's?
Lew: She named name!

Lois: So will you come to Hawaii with me Jerry?
Jerry: Maybe I will, Lois. Maybe I will. [winks at camera]

Elaine: All right, I'm going to order Chinese Food.
Ned: You're ordering from Hop Sing's, right?
Elaine: Ugh, does it have to be Hop Sing's. I kind of had a fight with him.
Ned: Elaine, when my father was black listed he couldn't work for years. He and his friends used to sit in Hop Sing's every day figuring out how to survive.
Elaine: You're father was blacklisted?
Ned: Yes, he was. And you know why? Because he was betrayed by people he trusted. They "named names".
Elaine: Okay, okay.