Kramer: Yeah, I'm gonna keep these here too, huh? They'll be all right.
Jerry: Kramer, these balloons aren't gonna stay filled till New Year's!
Kramer: Oh, those aren't for New Year's. Those are my everyday balloons.

Kramer: Do you think people will still be using napkins in the year 2000? Or is this mouth-vacuum thing for real?

Jerry: I had like a so-so date with Valerie, now I'm number nine on the speed-dial.
George: So?
Jerry: So? I used to be seven. I dropped two spots.
George: What, she's ranking you?
Jerry: Yeah, this speed-dial's like a relationship barometer.
George: What is a barometer exactly?
Kramer: It's pronounced thermometer. You know, in the year 2000, we'll all be on speed-dial. You'll just have to think of a person, they'll be talking to you. It'll be like... "Wait a minute, I'm getting a call here." Hey, it's Newman. "Hey, how you doing, Newman?" [Jerry mouths "I'm not here" and waves his arms] Oh, you wanna talk to Jerry?

Kramer: So Jerry, my millennium party's really coming together. Will people be able to breathe underwater in the year 2000?
Jerry: Some of us.
Kramer: [crumples piece of paper] I don't wanna exclude anybody.

Jerry: Hola.
Elaine: Shove it!
Jerry: What is all this?
Elaine: I got all this junk at Cinco de Mayo, because I was trying to show Putumayo how much business they'd lost. I mean, I've been dancing and strutting in front of their store for two days.
Jerry: Ah, no wonder we're getting so much rain.

Kramer: Well, I just got your invitation to the Newmannium party.
Newman: You just got it? Damn, the mail is slow.

Jerry: How could they not fire you?
George: Never thought I'd fail at failing.
Jerry: Aw, come on there now.
George: Feel like I can't do anything wrong.
Jerry: Nonsense. You do everything wrong.
George: Everything?
Jerry: Everything.
George: You really think so?
Jerry: Absolutely. I have no confidence in you.
George: All right. I guess I just have to pick myself up, dust myself off, and throw myself right back down again.
Jerry: That's the spirit. You suck.
George: I know.

[George is driving around the parking lot, dragging along a trophy]
George: Attention, Steinbrenner and front-office morons! Your triumphs mean nothing. You all stink. You can sit on it, and rotate! This is George Costanza. I fear no reprisal. Extension 5170.

Newman: What did you say to Elaine? I just got her cancellation in the mail.
Kramer: Oh, well I guess she found some place better to go.
Newman: Well, it's her mistake. Because she is going to miss the party of a lifetime.
Kramer: Well, maybe so, but come midnight, when she's looking for someone warm and cuddly to kiss, I guess you'll be caught between the moon and New York City.
Newman: All right. Come back to my party, please.
Kramer: Jerry too, of course.
Newman: You don't wanna do your act, or anything, do you?
Jerry: No.
Newman: All right then, I guess I can accept a little Jerry, if it gets me a lot of Elaine.
Kramer: Deal?
Newman: To the Newmannium!
Kramer: To the Kramennium.

Kramer: Elaine, I'm having a millennium party, so save the date.
Elaine: Hey, you know what? Newman sent me an invitation already, to his party.
Kramer: Newman?
Elaine: Yeah.
Kramer: "Come celebrate the millennium with 'Newmannium'." Newman!