Jerry: So, you're actually considering it?
Elaine: Well, it'll be a couple of years before he's completely bald. Those will be good times.
Jerry: Marriage is a big step, Elaine. Your life will totally change.
Elaine: Jerry, it's 3:30 in the morning. I'm at a cockfight. What am I clinging to?

George: Fantastic day. Fantastic.
Jerry: What happened?
George: Well, first, I'm brushing my teeth and this piece of apple-skin, that must have been lodged in there for days, comes loose.
Jerry: Fantastic.
George: Then, I'm at The Foundation...
Jerry: You're still doing that?
George: Sometimes. Once in a while.
Jerry: When you feel guilty?
George: No, occasionally I'll forget to let the machine pick up.

George: Hey, you know you got a bounced check hanging up in the little market over on Columbus?
Jerry: Yes, I know, I know.
George: I noticed you chose the clowns with balloons check design.
Jerry: It was a mistake. The bank sent me the wrong ones.

Jerry: Again, I'm really sorry about the check, Marcelino.
Marcelino: People seem to like the clowns.
Jerry: Look, let me just give you the forty, plus another twenty for your trouble.
Marcelino: Okay.
Jerry: Aren't you going to take the check down?
Marcelino: Sorry, no. It's store policy.
Jerry: But it's your bodega.
Marcelino: Even I am not above the policy.

Betsy: Those are our tennis courts.
George: Tennis courts? What about the yard? Where do they have the gang fights?
Betsy: There's no fights here, Mr. Costanza. This is a minimum security facility.
George: Hmm. What about a hole? You ever put anybody in "the box"?
Betsy: No.
George: [to himself] This prison stinks.

Betsy: And finally, the library, which has just been refurbished thanks to your generous donation. This is Celia Morgan, our librarian.
Celia: Nice to meet you.
Betsy: I'll be in my office if you need me.
George: Thanks, Warden.
Betsy: Betsy.
George: Betsy.

George: Betsy.
Celia: So, are you the head of the foundation?
George: Well, let's just say it wouldn't exist without me. [notices another person wearing the same outfit] So uh, you two shop at the same store?
Celia: No, it's standard issue.
George: Oh, my God, you're in jail? That is so cool!

George: Jerry, I like being with her. Plus, I know where she is all the time. I have relatively no competition. And you know how you live in fear of the pop-in?
Jerry: The pop-in.
George: Yeah, no pop-in, no "in the neighborhood," no "I saw your light was on." And the best part is, if things go really well...
Jerry: Conjugal visit?
George: Don't jinx it!

Kramer: Hey. What's up?
Jerry: George is dating a convict.
Kramer: Oh? What's she in for?
George: Embezzlement.
Kramer: Sounds like a nice girl.

Elaine: [looking at Kurt's wallet] Hey, driver's licence. Oh, my God.
Kurt: What?
Elaine: Your hair. It's so thick and lustrous. I mean, it was.
Kurt: Well, it still is. I shave my head for my swim team. I just liked the way it looked, so I kept it.
Elaine: Are you saying that I could be dating this hair? With you under it?