George: I think you absolutely have to say something to this guy. Confront him.
Elaine: Really?
George: Yes.
Elaine: You would do that?
George: If I was a different person.

Jerry: [on the phone] Hello. Hello. Is Glenn there? I'm sorry. Is this 805-555-3234? Yes, I know I have the wrong number. But I just want to know if I dialed wrong or if... [call ends; Jerry redials]
[Kramer enters the apartment. The buzzer goes. Kramer answers it.]
Kramer: Come on up.
Jerry: [on the phone] Oh, it's you again. See? Now if you had answered me, I wouldn't have had to do this. Now that's two long distance calls I made to you why can't you... [call ends] Why? Why do they just hang up like that?!

Kramer: Taste this.
Jerry: No, I just had a sandwich.
Kramer: No, taste it. Taste it.
Jerry: I don't want cantaloupe now.
Kramer: No, you've never had cantaloupe like this before.
Jerry: I only eat cantaloupe at certain times.
Kramer: Jerry, this is great cantaloupe.
Jerry: All right. [tastes it]
Kramer: Ah, huh. It's good?
Jerry: It's very good.
Kramer: Good, huh?
Jerry: Good.
Kramer: I got it at Joe's.
Jerry: Uh-huh.
Kramer: Forty-nine cents a pound. That's practically half than what you're paying at the supermarket. I don't know why you don't go to Joe's.

George: I'm outta there. I did it! It's over.
Jerry: You did it? What happened?
George: I told her. In the kitchen, which was risky 'cause it's near all the knives. I started with the word "Listen."
Jerry: Ah-ha.
George: I said, "Listen Marlene," and then the next thing I know, I'm in the middle of it. And there's this voice inside of me going: "You're doing it! You're doing it!" And then she started to cry, and I weakened a bit. I almost relented, but the voice, Jerry, the voice said "Keep going, keep going. You're almost out!" It's like I was making a prison break, you know. And I'm heading for the wall, and I trip and I twist my ankle, and they throw the light on you, you know. So, somehow I get though the crying and I keep running. Then the cursing started. She's firing at me from the guard tower: "Son of a bang! Son of a boom!" I get to the top of the wall, the front door, I open it up, I'm one foot away, I took one last look around the penitentiary, and I jumped!

Jerry: So that's it? You're out?
George: Except for one small problem. I left some books in her apartment.
Jerry: So, go get them.
George: Oh, no. No, I can't go back there. Jerry, it's so awkward. And, you know, it could be dangerous, sexually. Something could happen, I'd be right back where I started.

Marlene: So, it must've been ninety-five degrees that night, and everyone's just standing around the pool with little drinks in their hands. I was wearing my old jeans and T-shirt. And I don't know, I was just in one of those moods, so I said to myself, "Marlene, just do it," and I jumped in. And as I'm getting out, I feel all these eyes on me, and I look up and everyone is just staring at me.
Jerry: So what'd you do?
Marlene: Well, nothing. It's not skin off my hide if people like to look. I just didn't see what the big attraction was.
Jerry: Well, I have a general idea what it was. I could take a guess.
Marlene: [laughs] Hey, you know, Jerry, just because George and I don't see each other anymore, it doesn't mean we shouldn't stay friends.
Jerry: No.
Marlene: Good enough. I'm really glad we got that settled.

Jerry: You know, it's not like Marlene's a bad person or anything, but, my God! I mean, we've had like three lunches and a movie. And she never stops calling. And it's these meaningless, purposeless, blather calls. She never asks if I'm busy or anything. I just pick up the phone and she's in the middle of a sentence.
George: That's standard. Has she left you one of those messages where she uses up the whole machine?
Jerry: Oh. It's- You know, and sometimes she'll go, "Hello, Jerry?" and I'll go "Oh, hi Marlene." And then it's "Jerry.."
Both: "I don't know sometimes."
George: What about getting off the phone?
Jerry: Oh! You can't. It's impossible. There's no break in the conversation where you can go, "All right, then.. " You know, it just goes on and on and on with out a break in the wall. I mean, I gotta put a stop to this.
George: Just do it like a Band-Aid. One motion, right off! She is sexy though. Don't you think?
Jerry: Yeah. Yes, she is.

Receptionist: Mr. Costanza?
George: Yeah.
Receptionist: The doctor'll see you now.
George: [sarcastically] Yeah, doctor. I'm going to have to wait in that little room by myself, aren't I? [picks up a crossword puzzle] I better take this. I hate the little room. [sarcastically] Oh, hello, Doctor.

[Kramer enters the apartment with a golf club]
Kramer: Hey.
Jerry: Hey.
Kramer: I got it! This time, I got it!
Jerry: All right.
Kramer: Hips! See, it's all hips.
Jerry: Uh-huh.
Kramer: You gotta come through with the hips first. [demonstrates]
Jerry: That is out there.

Kramer: Joe's?
Jerry: No, supermarket.
Kramer: Well, is it good?
Jerry: It's okay.
Kramer: Let me taste it. [takes a bite, spits it out] See, that stinks. You can't eat that. You should take it back.
Jerry: I'm not taking it back.
Kramer: All right, I'll take it back. I'm going by there.
Jerry: I don't care about it.
Kramer: Jerry, you should care. Cantaloupe like this should be taken out of circulation.
Jerry: All right. Take it back.