Kenny Bania: Ouch.
Kramer: You didn't do so bad.
Jerry: What are you talking about? I bombed!
Kramer: No, you had some good stuff. The cancer bit? It was edgy. It was not my sort of thing but some of those people out there, they really liked it.
Jerry: Like who?
Kramer: Like that guy who yelled out.
Jerry: He had cancer!
Kramer: And laughter is the best medicine.

Jerry: Yeah, he killed. Because I killed first and warmed up the crowd. He's like that fish that attaches himself to the shark.
George: And you're the shark?
Jerry: Yeah, I'm the shark. And he's the fish eating my laughs.
George: I don't know how a fish could eat laughs.
Jerry: Well, I'm glad I brought it up.

George: Oh, my God.
Jerry: What?
George: I got a job interview. They want to see me this afternoon.
Jerry: So what's this job?
George: Oh, it's beautiful. It's in sports.
Jerry: Knicks? Rangers?
George: Playground equipment.
Jerry: Welcome back to the show.

Kramer: I gotta switch shaving cream. I'm getting no protection.
Jerry: What kind do you use?
Kramer: Whatever you get.

Jerry: Look, postcard from Elaine from Europe.
Kramer: Oh, don't tell me she's dragging another poor guy across Europe.
Jerry: Remember David Puddy?
Kramer: Oh, the face-painting auto mechanic. So she's dating him again, huh?
Jerry: Well, I guess she's batted around and she's back at the top of the order.
Kramer: Boy, a month in Europe with Elaine. That guy's coming home in a body bag.

David Puddy: Well, let's see, I've got a ten kroner, a five kroner, a twenty kroner. No wait, that's another ten kroner. A "femti" kroner? How much is that?
Elaine: We have to break up.
David Puddy: What?
Elaine: I can't take this anymore! I don't want to hear how interesting the change with the hole in it is. And if you tell me what time it is in New York again, you are going home in a body bag!
David Puddy: Well what about you? What do you think The Gap in Rome has that's not in The Gap on Broadway?
Elaine: Okay, all right listen. Forget about The Gap because we are through!
David Puddy: Fine!
Elaine: Fine!
Cab Driver: Okay, terminal three. Have a nice flight.

[David Puddy is sobbing in the seat next to Elaine]
Captain: [over p.a.] Ladies and gentlemen, our flight time, with stopovers, will be approximately 22 hours.
Elaine: Hey, you gonna bust out that drink cart or what?

Kramer: Hey, what are you doing?
Jerry: Oh, I'm taking this lace out. It came undone and touched the floor of a men's room. That's the end of that.

Kramer: They hooked me up.
George: What's with all the butter?
Kramer: I'm shaving with it. And you know what I discovered?
Jerry: You can eat it?
Kramer: No, my face feels so good, I'm gonna use it all over my body.

Jerry: I don't believe this.
George: You miss her, don't you?
Jerry: No. He's riding my coattails again. He's getting everything off me. First laughs, now ladies.
George: You miss her.