‘The Boyfriend’
Season 3, Episode 17 - Aired February 12, 1992
Jerry meets baseball legend Keith Hernandez and wants to make a good impression. George goes to drastic lengths to hang onto his unemployment check. Meanwhile, Hernandez takes an interest in Elaine, and Kramer and Newman have unfinished business with Hernandez.
Quote from George
George: You, uh, you like baseball? [picks up baseball from desk]
Mrs. Sokol: That was autographed by the '86 Mets. I saw every inning that year.
George: That's funny, 'cause I happen to be very good friends with Keith Hernandez.
Mrs. Sokol: You know Keith Hernandez.
George: [scoffs] Know him? [chuckles] Would you, uh, like to meet him?
Mrs. Sokol: Oh, come on. Come on.
George: I can produce Keith Hernandez right here within the hour.
Mrs. Sokol: All right. You got one hour.
George: All right, Mrs. S. I and my good pal Keith Hernandez will be right back.
Quote from Jerry
Keith Hernandez: Better bring your gloves, it's freezing out there. It shouldn't take too long. I'd say maybe, oh, four hours. Really though, Jerry, there's not that much. First we got the bedroom, we got two dressers and the bed.
Jerry: Is there a box spring?
Keith Hernandez: What's that?
Jerry: Is there a box spring?
Keith Hernandez: Yeah, there's a box spring, but it's attached to the headboard and we'll have to take
that apart. Then we got the couch.
Jerry: Is that a sectional?
Keith Hernandez: Yeah. Twelve pieces. A marble coffee table.
Jerry: Is that a thick marble?
Keith Hernandez: Three inches thick. Got it in Italy. But the big problem is going to be the convertible sofa. You see, when you move it it tends to open up so it's going to be real difficult getting it down the stairs.
Jerry: Stairs? There's no elevator?
Keith Hernandez: Nah, it's a brownstone. Three floors.
Jerry: I'm sorry I can't do this. I can't do it. I can't. It, it's too soon. I don't know you. I can't help you move. I'm sorry. I can't. I just can't.
Quote from Kramer
Kramer: Wait, uh what are you doing?
Keith Hernandez: I gotta move.
Kramer: Want any help?
Keith Hernandez: I'd love some.
Kramer: I'd love to help you move.
Newman: Me too.
Keith Hernandez: Okay, guys. We gotta be careful of one thing. Some of the stuff's very fragile. We're going to have to handle it like a baby.
Kramer: No sweat.
Quote from Jerry
Jerry: [answers phone] Hello. Oh, hi, Elaine. What's going on? No, he just left. You broke up with him? Me too! What happened? Oh, smoking? You know, you're like going out with C. Everett Koop. Me? Nah, I couldn't go through with it. I just didn't feel ready. So what are you doing now? Oh, great idea, I'll meet you there in like thirty minutes. Okay bye.