Jerry Quote #1243
Quote from Jerry in The Engagement
Jerry: So, tell me anyway. Who was the big mastermind?
Elaine: Oh, I can't Jerry. I'm sworn to secrecy.
Jerry: All right. But then I can't tell you the big news.
Elaine: News? What news?
Jerry: Sorry!
Elaine: What? What?
Jerry: All right, Elaine. But this is beyond news. This is like Pearl Harbor. Or the Kennedy assassination. It's like not even news. It's total shock.
Elaine: Oh, come on, Jerry. Please, please, please, please, please!
Jerry: George Costanza...
Elaine: Yeah?
Jerry: Is getting married!
Elaine: Get out! [pushes Jerry]
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Engagement’ Quotes
Quote from Kramer
Elaine: What time you got?
Kramer: Oh, no. I don't wear a watch.
Elaine: What do you do?
Kramer: Well, I tell time by the sun.
Elaine: How close do you get?
Kramer: Well, I can guess within an hour.
Elaine: [scoffs] Well, I can guess within the hour, and I don't even have to look at the sun.
Kramer: Yeah.
Elaine: Well, what about at night? What do you do then?
Kramer: Well, night's tougher but it's only a couple of hours.
Quote from Kramer
Kramer: I mean, what are you thinking about, Jerry? Marriage? Family?
Jerry: Well...
Kramer: They're prisons. Man made prisons. You're doing time. You get up in the morning. She's there. You go to sleep at night. She's there. It's like you gotta ask permission to use the bathroom. "Is it all right if I use the bathroom now?"
Jerry: Really?
Kramer: Yeah, and you can forget about watching TV while you're eating.
Jerry: I can?
Kramer: Oh, yeah. You know why? Because it's dinner time. And you know what you do at dinner?
Jerry: What?
Kramer: You talk about your day. "How was your day today? Did you have a good day today or a bad day today? Well, what kind of day was it?" "Well, I don't know. How about you? How was your day?"
Jerry: Boy.
Kramer: It's sad, Jerry. It's a sad state of affairs.
Jerry: I'm glad we had this talk.
Kramer: Oh, you have no idea.
Quote from Newman
[opening the door to a police officer]
Newman: What took you so long?