Frank Costanza Quote #28

Quote from Frank Costanza in The Chinese Woman

Frank Costanza: You know what I like about Manhattan? There's no mosquitoes.
George: There's plenty of mosquitoes.
Frank Costanza: Queens is full of mosquitoes.
George: So, Dad-
Frank Costanza: Gnats, too, if I'm not mistaken.

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 ‘The Chinese Woman’ Quotes

Quote from Estelle Costanza

Estelle Costanza: You're not Chinese?
Donna: No.
Estelle Costanza: I thought you were Chinese.
Donna: I'm from Long Island.
Estelle Costanza: Long Island? I thought I was getting advice from a Chinese woman.
Donna: I'm sorry.
Estelle Costanza: Well, then that changes everything.
George: What?
Estelle Costanza: She's not Chinese. I was duped!
George: So what? She still gave you advice. What's the difference if she's not Chinese?
Estelle Costanza: I'm not taking advice from some girl from Long Island.

Quote from Kramer

Jerry: Well, looks like you've adjusted to the boxers.
Kramer: Well, I wouldn't go as far as that.
Jerry: You went back to the Jockeys?
Kramer: Wrong again.
Jerry: Oh, no.
Elaine: What? What?
Jerry: Don't you see what's going on here? No boxers, no Jockeys.
Elaine: Eww.
Jerry: The only thing between him and us is a thin layer of gabardine.
Jerry: Kramer, say it isn't so.
Kramer: Oh, it be so. I'm out there, Jerry, and I'm loving every minute of it!
Jerry: Don't you need a little help?
Kramer: Surprisingly, no. I'm free. I'm unfettered. I feel like a naked, innocent boy roaming the countryside.

 Frank Costanza Quotes

Quote from The Strike

Frank Costanza: Kramer, I got your message. I haven't celebrated Festivus in years! What is your interest?
Kramer: Well, just tell me everything, huh?
Frank Costanza: Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reach for the last one they had, but so did another man. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way!
Kramer: What happened to the doll?
Frank Costanza: It was destroyed. But out of that, a new holiday was born. A Festivus for the rest of us!
Kramer: That must have been some kind of doll.
Frank Costanza: She was.

Quote from The Serenity Now

George: All right, Dad, we're five blocks from the house. Sit sideways.
Frank Costanza: Like an animal. Because of her, I have to sit here like an animal! Serenity now! Serenity now!
George: What is that?
Frank Costanza: Doctor gave me a relaxation cassette. When my blood pressure gets too high, the man on the tape tells me to say, "Serenity now!"
George: Are you supposed to yell it?
Frank Costanza: The man on the tape wasn't specific.
George: What happened to the screen door? It blew off again?
Estelle Costanza: I told you to fix that thing.
Frank Costanza: Serenity now!