George Quote #728

Quote from George in The Conversion

George: She likes you.
Jerry: Yeah, but there's a problem. I found a tube of a fungicide in her medicine cabinet.
George: So?
Jerry: So, I don't know what she's using it for.
George: Well, how do you even know it's hers? Maybe it belonged to Carol. Did you see a name on the tube?
Jerry: I didn't even think to look.
George: Well, take a look. It might not even belong to her.
Jerry: Yeah.
George: People always leave old things in their medicine cabinet.
Jerry: Yeah, I've got this old bottle of cough medicine.
George: I still have Brylcreem.

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 ‘The Conversion’ Quotes

Quote from George

George: I can't believe how easy it is. I'm virtually Orthodox. All I have to do is read a few books, memorize a few prayers, and I'm in the club.
Jerry: That's all there is to it?
George: That's all there is to it. By Christmas day, I will be Brother Costanza.
Jerry: And what is Brother Costanza planning on telling Mother Costanza?
George: Brother Costanza will be taking the vow of silence.

Quote from George

Older Priest: I must say, George, I was somewhat surprised at the results of your conversion test. I don't recall having seen such an impressive performance. You truly must be filled with the spirit of the Lord.
George: Oh, I'm... I'm full of it, Father.

Quote from Jerry

[stand-up:]
Jerry: You know, doctor is supposed to be such a prestigious occupation. But it’s really like one of the only jobs where you have to have your diploma right up there on the wall. It makes them seem so insecure, doesn't it? "I really am a doctor, you know. You think I'm not, just check it out." I mean, I don't know why they need these little bits of psychological leverage over us all the time. "Go in that little room, take your pants off, wait 15 minutes, and then I'll give you my opinion." I mean, after that, anyone that comes in with pants on seems like they know what they’re talking about. In any difference of opinion, pants always beats no-pants.