Jerry Quote #807

Quote from Jerry in The Bris

Jerry: Oh, well, if it isn't Shaky the Mohel. Nice job on the circumcision, but it's not supposed to be a finger.
Mohel: The circumcision was perfect. That was your fault. You flinched!
Jerry: Oh, who made you a mohel? You get your degree from a matchbook?
Mohel: You see? He flinched again.
Jerry: Nice job, Elaine. You picked a hell of a mohel!
Mohel: One more peep, and I'll slice you like a smoked sturgeon.
Jerry: Oh, don't threaten me, butcher boy.
Mohel: Butcher boy?

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 ‘The Bris’ Quotes

Quote from Kramer

Kramer: Hey, I just saw a pig-man. A pig-man. He was sleeping, and then he woke up and he looked at me... and he made this horrible sound, this [squeals].
George: Kramer, what are you talking about?
Kramer: I'm talking about a pig-man. I walked in the wrong room, and there he was.
George: A pig-man?
Kramer: A pig-man. Half pig, half man.

Quote from Kramer

Kramer: Hey, we're not talking about a manicure. Imagine, this is gonna be his first memory... of his parents just standing there while some stranger, [chopping noise], cuts off a piece of his manhood and then serves a catered lunch. [Myra starts crying]
Stan: Myra?
Kramer: She'll be okay.

Quote from Kramer

Kramer: Don't ever question my instincts, because my instincts are honed. Look at that. Look, look.
Jerry: What now? "Hospital receives grant to conduct DNA research. Government funds genetic research at area hospital." Yeah, so?
Kramer: Pig-man, baby, pig-man.
Elaine: If I have to hear about this pig-man one more time...
Kramer: Hey, I'm telling you, the pig-man is alive. The government has been experimenting with pig-men since the '50s.
Jerry: Oh, will you stop it? Just because the hospital's conducting DNA research doesn't mean they're creating mutant pig-men.
Kramer: Jerry, will you wake up to reality? It's a military thing. They're probably creating a whole army of pig warriors.