Kramer: Hey, I just saw a pig-man. A pig-man. He was sleeping, and then he woke up and he looked at me... and he made this horrible sound, this [squeals].
George: Kramer, what are you talking about?
Kramer: I'm talking about a pig-man. I walked in the wrong room, and there he was.
George: A pig-man?
Kramer: A pig-man. Half pig, half man.

Kramer: Hey, we're not talking about a manicure. Imagine, this is gonna be his first memory... of his parents just standing there while some stranger, [chopping noise], cuts off a piece of his manhood and then serves a catered lunch. [Myra starts crying]
Stan: Myra?
Kramer: She'll be okay.

[stand-up:]
Jerry: You go to a hospital, the basic treatment everybody gets is to lie in a bed. Whatever's wrong with a human being, lie down. Doctor never says, "Well, your condition isn't as bad as we thought. We want you to kind of lean against a doorjamb for seven to 10 days. See how that feels." It's always a bed. Unless you go to the emergency room, then it's a chair. You've been shot, stabbed, run over: "Have a seat." There's always a vry interesting cultural, ethnic mix to the hospital staff, isn't there? It's like a local news team in there. The doctor's the anchorman. He's got white hair, he's in charge. The nurse is like the feature reporter, you know. You listen to her, but it's always, "And now, back to your doctor." You know, the orderlies come in with food and bedpans. That's like your sports and weather.