Jerry Quote #521

Quote from Jerry in The Bubble Boy

Naomi: Thanks again for the Chinese food.
Jerry: Oh, you're welcome. You know, I think I ate too much of that garlic.
Naomi: Yeah, me too,
Jerry: No, I ate the whole plate. I didn't know those little things were garlic.
Naomi: [obnoxious laugh] Oh, you know what? I think Naked Gun is on. I've seen it. I laughed through that whole thing. You wanna watch?
Jerry: No, I mean, I don't think so.
Naomi: I thought you liked to laugh. I thought you were happy go lucky.
Jerry: No. Nah. I'm not happy and I'm not lucky, and I don't go. If anything, I'm sad stop unlucky.
Naomi: [obnoxious laugh]
Jerry: That's not funny, Naomi. I didn't mean to be funny there. Why don't you check the TV Guide. I think, uh, Holocaust is on.

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 ‘The Bubble Boy’ Quotes

Quote from George

Donald: [o.s.] Okay, history. This is for the game. How you doing over there? Not too good.
George: All right, bubble boy. Let's just play. "Who invaded Spain in the 8th century?"
Donald: That's a joke. The Moors.
George: Oh, no. I'm so sorry. It's the "Moops". The correct answer is, the "Moops".
Donald: Moops? Let me see that. [takes card with gloved hand] That's not Moops, you jerk. That's Moors. It's a misprint.
George: I'm sorry. The card says Moops.
Donald: It doesn't matter. It's Moors. There's no Moops.
George: It's Moops.

Quote from Jerry

Mel Sanger: Excuse me. Anyway, we were watching you on TV.
Jerry: You get in the bubble with him?
Mel Sanger: No. He can see through the bubble. It's plastic.
Jerry: Oh, I thought it was like an igloo.
Mel Sanger: No, it's clear.
Jerry: Ah-ha.
Elaine: Who has the remote?
Mel Sanger: He does.
Elaine: The remote goes through the bubble?
Mel Sanger: Yeah, he's in the bubble with the remote.
Jerry: So you have no control over the remote?
Mel Sanger: No, it's frustrating.

Quote from Jerry

[stand-up:]
Jerry: Have you ever called someone up and you're disappointed when they answer the phone? You wanted the machine! You know, and you're always kind of thrown off. You go, "Oh, I didn't know you were there. I just wanted to leave you a message saying, 'Sorry I missed you.'" So here what we have is two people hate each other, don't ever really want to talk, but the phone machine is like this relationship respirator keeping these marginal, brain-dead relationships alive. And we all do it. Why? So that when we come home, you can see that little flashing red light. All right, messages. See, people need that. It's very important for human beings to feel popular and well-liked amongst a large group of people we don't care for.