Jerry Quote #428
Quote from Jerry in The Letter
Jerry: This is amazing, you can't believe this!
George: What's it say?
Jerry: Listen to this: "I don't know what you expect to find out there, Jerry, you know what you want better than me. But there's one thing I do know. I know I can stand here watching you try to destroy everything I've ever wanted in my life, wanting to smash your face with my fists, because you won't make even the slightest effort to offer happiness and still know that I love you. You mean so much to me that I'm willing to take all your abuse and insults and insensitivity."
George: Wow.
Kramer: She's deep.
Jerry: "...'cause that's what you need to do to prove I'm not going to leave you. I'm sick and tired of running from places and people and relationships. You want me, that fight for me, becau-" [Kramer blows his nose loudly] "...because I'm sure as hell fighting for you!" [Kramer wipes the snotty cloth on George's painting]
Kramer: You know Jerry, she sounds like a poet!
Jerry: No one's ever written me a letter like this. Maybe I was wrong about her!
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Letter’ Quotes
Quote from Jerry
[stand-up:]
Jerry: Do you think that the security guards in the art museums really ever stop anybody from taking the paintings? I mean, are they going up to people going, "Hey, where do you think you're going with that? Hey, come over here. Come over here. Give me that Cezanne." I mean, look at the job that this man is hired to do. He's getting five dollars an hour to protect millions of dollars of priceless art with what? He's got a light mocha brown uniform and a USA Today. This is what he's got. I mean, crooks must look at this guy and think, "Well, all we've got to do is get past the folding chair and the thermos of coffee, and we can get a Rembrandt."
Quote from Jerry
Jerry: Wait, wait a second! Go back, go back to that.
Elaine: It's Chapter 2. It's Neil Simon.
Jerry: Wait a second. Wait a second. My God. The letter. That's the letter.
Elaine: What letter?
Jerry: This is the letter she wrote to me. She stole it right from the movie!
Jerry: [in unison with the woman on TV] "...'cause you don't even make the slightest effort to offer happiness still know that I love you!"
George: This is incredible.
Jerry: I always thought there was something funny about this letter. She's copied it right out of Chapter 2. She's a thief, a bunko-artist!
George: Maybe I won't send her that check.
Elaine: You know, it's not really that terrible.
Jerry: What are you talking about? She completely misrepresented herself. I don't opt for happiness? I opt for happiness. James Caan doesn't opt for happiness!
Quote from Kramer
[A wealthy, elderly couple admire Nina's painting of Kramer:]
Mrs. Armstrong: I sense great vulnerability. A man-child crying out for love. An innocent orphan in the post-modern world.
Mr. Armstrong: I see a parasite. A sexually-depraved miscreant, who is seeking to gratify basest and most immediate urges.
[cut:]
Mrs. Armstrong: His struggle is man's struggle. He lifts my spirit.
Mr. Armstrong: He is a loathsome, offensive brute. Yet I can't look away.
[cut:]
Mrs. Armstrong: He transcends time and space.
Mr. Armstrong: He sickens me.
Mrs. Armstrong: I love it.
Mr. Armstrong: Me too.