George Quote #286
Quote from George in The Pez Dispenser
Old Guy: The male kangaroo doesn't have a pouch only the female has it. The male has pouch envy.
Elaine: [chuckles]
Old Guy: "Why should she have this huge pouch and I have nothing? I have things to carry too. At least give me a pocket."
Elaine: [laughs]
[As Elaine laughs, Noel turns to Elaine. Elaine tries to cover it with a cough.]
Noel: That laugh. That's the laugh. That's it. You're the one.
Elaine: No, no. It was an accident. It really wasn't my fault. It was Jerry. Jerry put a PEZ dispenser on my leg.
Noel: You put a PEZ dispenser on her leg during my recital?
Jerry: I didn't know she would laugh.
Noel: And you, you lied to me George, you lied to me.
George: No, I, uh... Um... Wh- Wh- What did I do?
Noel: I ... am breaking up with you!
George: You can't break up with me. I've got hand.
Noel: And you're going to need it.
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Pez Dispenser’ Quotes
Quote from Jerry
[stand-up:]
Jerry: Women put on their perfume in an interesting way. I love watching them do that. You ever notice that, guys? They have their little key, Stratego little areas. [hums, mimics putting perfume on] Places they think we're going. And they always hit this one. [points to the back of his wrist] Women are convinced this is the most action-packed area that could ever happen in the dating world. What? What is that, ladies? What is happening here? Is that in case you slap the guy or something? He still finds you intriguing. [mimes being slapped] "Oh! Chanel."
Quote from Jerry
Jerry: You know, I think Kramer might have been responsible for getting Richie involved with drugs in the first place.
Elaine: What? How?
Jerry: A few years ago, the comedy club had a softball team. Kramer was our first baseman. You couldn't get anything by him. It was unbelievable. Anyway, this one game we came back to win from, like, eight runs behind. So Kramer says to Richie, why don't you dump the bucket of Gatorade on Marty Benson's head. The club owner. So Richie goes ahead and does it.
Elaine: So? What happened?
Jerry: What happened? The guy was, like, 67 years old. It was freezing out, he caught a cold, got pneumonia, and a month later he was dead.
Elaine: Shut up!
Jerry: All the comedians were happy. Because he was one of these club owners nobody liked anyway. But Richie was never the same.
Elaine: What about Kramer?
Jerry: He's the same!
Quote from George
Elaine: When I was outside I ran into John Molika.
Jerry: Really John Molika, they guy that used to bartend at the Comedy Club. How's he doing?
Elaine: He's good.
George: Uh, can we cut to the chase?
Jerry: "Cut to the chase"?
George: Yeah.
Jerry: What are you, "Joe Hollywood"?
George: A lot of people say it.
Jerry: I would lose that.
George: [accusingly] What's that?
Jerry: "Lose that"? That's not a Hollywood expression!
George: ... Yes, it is.