Jerry Quote #196
Quote from Jerry in The Chinese Restaurant
Elaine: You know, it's not fair people are seated first come, first Served. It should be based on who's hungriest. I feel like just walking over there and taking some food off somebody's plate.
Jerry: I'll tell you what. There's fifty bucks in it for you if you do it.
Elaine: What do you mean?
Jerry: You walk over that table, you pick up an egg roll, you don't say anything, you eat it, say '"Thank you very much", wipe your mouth, walk away, I give you fifty bucks.
George: What are they gonna do?
Jerry: They won't do anything. In fact, you'll be giving them a story to tell for the rest of their lives.
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Chinese Restaurant’ Quotes
Quote from George
George: Well, after dinner last week, she invites me back to her apartment.
Jerry: I'm with you.
George: Well, it's this little place with this little bathroom. It's like right there, you know, it's not even down a little hall or off in an alcove. You understand? There's no... buffer zone. So, we start to fool around, and it's the first time, and it's early in the going. And I begin to perceive this impending... intestinal requirement, whose needs are going to surpass by great lengths anything in the sexual realm. So I know I'm gonna have to stop. And as this is happening I'm thinking, even if I can somehow manage to momentarily... extricate myself from the proceedings and relieve this unstoppable force, I know that that bathroom is not gonna provide me with the privacy that I know I'm going to need.
Jerry: This could only happen to you.
George: So I finally stop and say, "Tatiana, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but I think it would be best if I left".
Jerry: You said this to her after.
George: No. During.
Jerry: Oh, boy.
George: Yeah.
Jerry: Wow! So...?
George: So I'm dressing and she's staring up at me, struggling to compute this unprecedented turn of events. I don't know what to say to reassure this woman, and worst of all, I don't have the time to say it. The only excuse she might possibly have accepted is if I told her I am in reality Batman, and I'm very sorry, I just saw the Bat-Signal. It took me 3 days of phone calls to get her to agree to see me again. Now she's waiting for me to call her, and she's... still on the phone.
Quote from Jerry
Elaine: No, they just have to get more cops on the force, it's as simple as that.
George: Cops. I don't even care about cops. I wanna see more garbage men. It's much more important. All I wanna see are garbage trucks, garbage cans and garbage men. You're never gonna stop crime, we should at least be clean.
Jerry: I tell you what they should do, they should combine the two jobs. Make it one job, 'cop\garbage man'. I always see cops walking around with nothing to do. Grab a broom! Start sweeping. You sweep, sweep, sweep. Catch a criminal, get right back to sweeping.
Elaine: You should run for mayor.
Jerry: Eh, nobody listens.
Quote from Elaine
Elaine: Did you ever notice how happy people are when they finally get a table? They think they're so special because they've been chosen. It's enough to make you sick.
Jerry: Boy, you are really hungry.