Jerry Quote #112
Quote from Jerry in The Phone Message
Jerry: Tan pants. Why do I buy tan pants, Donna? I don't feel comfortable in them.
Donna: Are those cotton Dockers?
Jerry: Oh, I can't begin to tell you how much I hate that commercial.
Donna: Really? I like that commercial. [Jerry pauses]
Jerry: You like that commercial?
Donna: Yeah, it's clever.
Jerry: Now wait a second, you mean the one where the guys are all standing around, supposedly being very casual and witty?
Donna: Yeah, that's the one.
Jerry: What could you possibly like about that?
Donna: I don't know, I like the guys.
Jerry: [sarcastically] Yeah, they're so funny and so comfortable with each other. And I could be comfortable too, if I had pants like that. I could sit on a porch and wrestle around, and maybe even be part of a real bull session.
Donna: Hey, I know guys like that. To me the dialogue rings true.
Jerry: Even if the dialogue did ring true. Even if somehow, somewhere men actually talk like that, what does that have to do with the pants? Doesn't that bother you?
Donna: That's the idea. That is what is clever about it. That they're not talking about the pants.
Jerry: But they're talking about nothing.
Donna: That's the point.
Jerry: I know the point.
Donna: No one is telling you to like it.
Jerry: I mean, all those quick shots of the pants, just pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants. What is that supposed to be?
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Phone Message’ Quotes
Quote from George
George: I can't stand doing laundry. That's why I have forty pairs of underwear.
Carol: You do not.
George: Absolutely. Because instead of doing a wash, I just keep buying underwear. My goal is to have over three hundred and sixty pair. That way, I only have to do wash once a year.
Quote from Elaine
Jerry: I'm supposed to see her again on Thursday, but can I go out with someone who actually likes this commercial.
Elaine: I once broke up with a guy because he didn't keep his bathroom clean enough.
Jerry: No kidding. Did you tell him that was the reason?
Elaine: Oh yeah, I told him all the time. You would not have believed his tub. Germs were building a town in there. They were constructing offices. Houses near the drain were going for $150,000.
Quote from Jerry
[stand-up:]
Jerry: The bad thing about television is that everybody you see on television is doing something better than what you're doing. Did you ever see anybody on TV like just sliding off the front of the sofa with potato chip crumbs on their face? Some people have a little too much fun on television: the soda commercial people. Where do they summon this enthusiasm? Have you seen them? "We have soda, we have soda, we have soda", jumping, laughing, flying through the air. It's a can of soda. Have you ever been standing there and you're watching TV and you're drinking the exact same product that they're advertising right there on TV? And it's like, you know, they're spiking volleyballs, jet-skiing, girls in bikinis and I'm standing there... "Maybe I'm putting too much ice in mine."