Jerry Quote #62
Quote from Jerry in The Stock Tip
Jerry: Have you thought any more about that trip?
Vanessa: Yeah, I've been thinking about it.
Jerry: You know, my friend told me about this great place in Vermont.
Vanessa: I don't know. I just worry about trips like this.. It's a lot of pressure.
Jerry: It's great! It speeds up the intimacy level. It's like putting the relationship in a time compressor. Where we would be six months from now we accomplish... [snaps] three days.
Vanessa: Oh, so you want to move our relationship into Phase Two?
Jerry: Exactly. I love Phase Two. Extra toothbrushes, increased call frequency, walking around naked. You know, the presents get a lot better in Phase Two.
Vanessa: Really? Could we go fishing up there?
Jerry: Yeah. We can fish. What? Blues, carp, marlin?
Vanessa: They have marlin in Vermont?
Jerry: Oh, big fighting marlin.
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Stock Tip’ Quotes
Quote from Kramer
Kramer: You know, I can't believe you put your money in that Centrax. And you could've invested in my roll-out tie dispenser.
Jerry: Roll-out tie dispenser? What was that one?
Kramer: Okay, you're in a restaurant. You've got a very big meeting coming up.
Jerry: Okay.
Kramer: "Oh, man". You got mustard on your tie.
Jerry: Oh, no!
Kramer: You just... tear it off, and you got a new one right here. Then you're gone.
Jerry: You're gone, all right.
Quote from Jerry
Jerry: I think Superman probably has a very good sense of humor.
George: I never heard him say anything really funny.
Jerry: But it's common sense. He's got super strength, super speed. I'm sure he's got super humor.
George: You would think that, but either you're born with a sense of humor, or you're not. It's not going to change even if you go from the red sun of Krypton all the way to the yellow sun of the Earth.
Jerry: Why? Why would that one area of his mind not be affected by the yellow sun of Earth?
George: I don't know. But he ain't funny.
Quote from Jerry
[stand-up:]
Jerry: I'm not an investor. People always tell me, you should have your money working for you. I've decided I'll do the work. I'm gonna let the money relax. You know what I mean? 'Cause you send your money out there working for you, a lot of times, it gets fired. You go back there, "What happened? I had my money. It was here, it was working for me." "Yeah, I remember your money. Showing up late. Taking time off. We had to let him go."