Jerry Quote #1613
Quote from Jerry in The Millenium
Jerry: [answers phone] Hello?
Valerie: Jerry, I was just at my stepmom's house, and I saw that you were on her speed-dial.
Jerry: Uh, well, she uh, probably just wanted to be able to keep tabs on you. [phone beeps] Hold on a second. [switches line] Hello?
Mrs. Hamilton: Hi, Jerome.
Jerry: Oh, Mrs. Hamilton, this is a very bad time. I've got Valerie on the other line. Just a second. [switches] Hello?
Valerie: That's her on the other line, isn't it?
Jerry: Well...
Valerie: Tell her I don't want you on her speed-dial.
Jerry: Hang on. [switches line] She knows about the speed-dial. Mrs Hamilton, you gotta get me off this
thing.
Mrs. Hamilton: I won't, until she puts me back on hers.
Jerry: Hang on. [switches line] She wants to be back on yours.
Valerie: Fine. But only if you're off hers.
Jerry: Hang on. [switches line] Fine, if I'm off yours.
Valerie: No, still me.
Jerry: Sorry. Hang on. [actually switches line] Fine, if I'm off yours.
Mrs. Hamilton: I won't do it. It's my speed-dial, and I don't trust her.
Jerry: Please, Mrs Hamilton, this is very awkward for me.
Mrs. Hamilton: All right. I'll hide you in one of the emergency buttons.
Jerry: Great, bye. [switches line] She said she'll do it.
Valerie: Great.
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Millenium’ Quotes
Quote from Newman
Kramer: Well, what am I gonna do? I got over two hundred folding chairs, and quite a bit of ice.
Newman: What kind?
Kramer: Cubed.
Newman: That's good stuff, and you can never have too much ice. All right, I'll tell you what I'll do. You can co-host the party with me, under one condition. No Jerry. Jerry is not invited.
Kramer: I gotta invite Jerry. He's my buddy.
Newman: That he may be. But he's outta my life, starting in the year 2000. For me, the next millennium must be Jerry-free!
Quote from Mr. Steinbrenner
George: You wanted to see me, sir?
Mr. Steinbrenner: I heard about what happened at the meeting this morning...
George: Oh, yes. I already packed up my desk, sir. I can be outta here in an hour.
Mr. Steinbrenner: ...and I have to tell you, it's exactly what this organisation needed. We wanna look to the future, we gotta tear down the past. Babe Ruth was nothing more than a fat old man with little-girl legs. And here's something I just found out recently. He wasn't really a sultan. Huh, what do you make of that? Hey, check this out. [stands up] Lou Gehrig's pants. Not a bad fit. Hey, you don't think that nerve disease of his was contagious, do you? Uh, I better take them off. I'm too important to this team. Big Stein can't be flopping and twitching. Hey, how about some lunch. What are you going for?
Quote from Kramer
Kramer: Hi, I'm H.E. Pennypacker. I'm a wealthy American industrialist, uh, looking to open a silver mine in the mountains of Peru. And uh, before I invest millions in a lucrative mine, I, I'd like to go a little native. Uh. Get the feel of their condiments, of their unmentionables. You know, the real uh, gritty-gritty. [eats chips]
Gladys: Well, let me show you what we have.
Kramer: Well, uh, I think I can just browse around on my own. [eats chips] Hmm, Machu Pichu. Are these free?
Gladys: Yeah.
Kramer: Hmm-mmm.
[Kramer walks over to a rack, indiscriminately takes a selection of clothes, and then starts choking on the chips on his way to the changing room]
Gladys: Some of those are women's clothes.
Kramer: Oh, not a problem.
[Kramer closes the curtain. The sound of a pricing gun can be heard. Kramer drops it and then steps on it.]