Seinfeld - Elaine Quote #249
Elaine: Why are you talking about my shoes?
Elaine: My Botticelli shoes. You've been talking about my Botticelli shoes.
Gail: What are you talking about?
Elaine: Did you or did you not tell Kramer that I got my shoes at Botticelli's?
Waiter: Too spicy. He wants another one. You got that pasta primavera?
Gail: Look, Elaine, I am very busy here.
Elaine: Who else have you mentioned my shoes to, huh? I wanna know why my footwear is your conversation!
Gail: I am not discussing this. This is insane.
Waiter: You got that pasta primavera? Let's go!
[As Gail passes the plate to the waiter, Elaine sneezes on it. The waiter doesn't notice and keeps walking...]
Waiter: Here you are, Mr. Dalrymple.
Russell: Thank you.
Waiter: Sorry for the delay. Enjoy your lunch.
Quote from Elaine
Elaine: [imitates Gail] "Oh, look at you, the Botticelli's."
Jerry: That bothered you?
Elaine: Yes, it bothered me. So I bought a pair of shoes at Botticelli's, I'm not allowed to shop there? That really embarrassed me.
Jerry: It did?
Elaine: Yes! Couldn't you see that?
Jerry: No. This is why you're not in the pilot.
Quote from George
Jerry: Now come on, let's stay with it, we gotta finish this today.
George: Okay. Hey, you know what, maybe I should give it to my therapist to read. She's smart, I trust her.
Jerry: Yeah, maybe I'll give it to Elaine.
George: Hey, you know, we haven't brought the Elaine character into the show yet. We should try and get her into this scene.
Jerry: Right, right. Okay. [writes] "Elaine enters." What does she say...?
George: I don't know, what do women say?
Jerry: I don't know.
George: I don't even know what they think. That's why I'm in therapy.
Quote from Kramer
Kramer: You are never gonna believe who I just ran into today.
Kramer: Your old flame. Gail Cunningham.
Jerry: Did you talk to her?
Kramer: Well, I was on my way to the Y, and I saw her coming towards me? I didn't know what to do! Because I remembered you had three dates with her and she wouldn't kiss you goodnight. So now I'm thinking, you know, what is my duty to my friend? Do I acknowledge her? Do I ignore her? I mean, what is my responsibility here?
Jerry: So what happened?
Kramer: Yeah, yeah, so she sees me and she goes, [female voice] "Oh, hi! Kramer!" You know? Like nothing happened! Like she never, you know, went three dates with you and refused to kiss you goodnight.
Jerry: Yeah, I know about the three dates.
Kramer: You know what I did? I snubbed her.
Jerry: What do you mean, you snubbed her?
Kramer: I walked right by her... Never said a word.
Jerry: Right by her?
Kramer: Right by her!
Quote from The Muffin Tops
Woman: I can't believe somebody pulled the top off of this muffin.
Elaine: That was me. I'm sorry. I don't like the stumps.
Mr. Lippman: So you just eat the tops?
Elaine: Oh, yeah. It's the best part. It's crunchy. It's explosive. It's where the muffin breaks free of the pan and sort of does its own thing. I'll tell you. That's a million dollar idea right there. Just sell the tops.
Quote from The Glasses
Elaine: I've got such a headache. Oh, that's another symptom!
Kramer: Of what?
Kramer: Oh, that's fatal. You don't want that!
Elaine: [grabs Kramer] I know I don't want it! I don't need you to tell me what I don't want, you stupid hipster dufus!
Quote from The Andrea Doria
George: The tenant association made me give it to this guy because he was an Andrea Doria survivor.
Elaine: Andrea Doria? Isn't that the one they did the song about?
Jerry: Edmund Fitzgerald.
Elaine: I love Edmund Fitzgerald's voice.
Jerry: No, Gordon Lightfoot was the singer. Edmund Fitzgerald was the ship.
George: You could fit 15 people in that bathroom..
Elaine: I think Gordon Lightfoot was the boat.
Jerry: Yeah, and it was rammed by the Cat Stevens.