George Quote #138
Quote from George in The Chinese Restaurant
George: Well, after dinner last week, she invites me back to her apartment.
Jerry: I'm with you.
George: Well, it's this little place with this little bathroom. It's like right there, you know, it's not even down a little hall or off in an alcove. You understand? There's no... buffer zone. So, we start to fool around, and it's the first time, and it's early in the going. And I begin to perceive this impending... intestinal requirement, whose needs are going to surpass by great lengths anything in the sexual realm. So I know I'm gonna have to stop. And as this is happening I'm thinking, even if I can somehow manage to momentarily... extricate myself from the proceedings and relieve this unstoppable force, I know that that bathroom is not gonna provide me with the privacy that I know I'm going to need.
Jerry: This could only happen to you.
George: So I finally stop and say, "Tatiana, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but I think it would be best if I left".
Jerry: You said this to her after.
George: No. During.
Jerry: Oh, boy.
George: Yeah.
Jerry: Wow! So...?
George: So I'm dressing and she's staring up at me, struggling to compute this unprecedented turn of events. I don't know what to say to reassure this woman, and worst of all, I don't have the time to say it. The only excuse she might possibly have accepted is if I told her I am in reality Batman, and I'm very sorry, I just saw the Bat-Signal. It took me 3 days of phone calls to get her to agree to see me again. Now she's waiting for me to call her, and she's... still on the phone.
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Chinese Restaurant’ Quotes
Quote from Elaine
Elaine: [talking through gritted teeth] I know this sounds crazy, but the two men who are standing behind me are going to give me fifty bucks if I stand here and eat one of your eggrolls.
[The elderly people at the table are confused]
Elaine: I'll give you twenty-five if you let me do it.
Man #1: What?
Woman #1: What is she talking about?
Man #2: What did she say?
[Elaine retreats]
Jerry: What happened?
Elaine: Did you see that?
George: What were you doing?
Elaine: [laughing] I offered them 25, they had no idea...
Quote from Jerry
Elaine: No, they just have to get more cops on the force, it's as simple as that.
George: Cops. I don't even care about cops. I wanna see more garbage men. It's much more important. All I wanna see are garbage trucks, garbage cans and garbage men. You're never gonna stop crime, we should at least be clean.
Jerry: I tell you what they should do, they should combine the two jobs. Make it one job, 'cop\garbage man'. I always see cops walking around with nothing to do. Grab a broom! Start sweeping. You sweep, sweep, sweep. Catch a criminal, get right back to sweeping.
Elaine: You should run for mayor.
Jerry: Eh, nobody listens.
Quote from Elaine
Elaine: Did you ever notice how happy people are when they finally get a table? They think they're so special because they've been chosen. It's enough to make you sick.
Jerry: Boy, you are really hungry.