Jerry Quote #185
Quote from Jerry in The Baby Shower
[When Jerry enters his apartment with his luggage, a group of suited men are waiting in his apartment]
FBI Agent: Mr. Steinfeld?
Jerry: Seinfeld.
FBI Agent: We're with the FBI. You wanna tell us about your cable hook-up?
Jerry: My cable hook-up? What about it?
FBI Agent: It's been illegally installed, Mr. Steinfeld.
Jerry: It has? I've been out of town. How did you know?
[An agent leads Kramer out of the bedroom into the living room]
Kramer: Jerry, I had to tell them. I had to. I had no choice. Ah, they were onto the scam from the very beginning.
FBI Agent: You're in serious trouble, Mr. Steinfeld.
Jerry: Wait a minute. Wait a minute, hold on! We're just patsies. We're just a couple of users. We never sold the stuff. What about the Russian guy? The Russian guy is the guy you want.
[The Russian guy steps out of the bedroom, wearing a suit and having lost his Eastern European accent]
Tabachnik: Mr. Seinfeld, Agent Stone. FBI. Undercover.
[Jerry makes a run for it]
Kramer: No! Jerry!
[The FBI agents unleash a torrent of bullets as Jerry dashes towards the door. He is hit by a flurry of bullets. As he drops to the floor, he makes one last attempt to grab the door handle. Tabachnik shoots him at point-blank range]
Kramer: No! Cable boy? Cable boy. What have you done to my little cable boy?
[reality: Jerry wakes up on an airplane]
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Baby Shower’ Quotes
Quote from Jerry
[stand-up:]
Jerry: What do you do at the end of a date when you know you don't want to see this person ever again, for the rest of your life? What do you say? What do you say? No matter what you say, it's a lie. "I'll see you around. See you around. If you're around, and I'm around, I'll see you around that area. You'll be around other people. You won't be around me. But you will be around." "Take care now." Did you ever say that to somebody? "Take care now. Take care, now. Because, I'm not going to be taking care of you. So, you should take care, now." "Take care. Take care." What does this mean? "Take off!" Isn't that what you really want to say? "Take off now."
Quote from Jerry
[stand-up:]
Jerry: I'm not afraid of flying, although many people do have fear of flying and, I have no argument with that. I think fear of flying is quite rational, because human beings cannot fly. Humans have fear of flying same way fish have fear of driving. You put a fish behind the wheel, and they go, "This isn't right. I shouldn't be doing this. I don't belong here."
Quote from George
George: Someday, before I die, mark my words, I'm gonna tell that woman exactly what I think of her. I'll never be able to forgive myself until I do.
Jerry: And if you do?
George: Well, I still won't be able to forgive myself, but at least it won't be about this.