Kramer Quote #1116

Quote from Kramer in The Puerto Rican Day

Man: Hey! There's a guy burning the Puerto Rican flag!
Bob: Who? Who is burning the flag?!
Kramer: Oh, no.
Bob: Him?!
Cedric: That's not very nice.
Kramer: It was an accident.
Bob: Do you know what day this is? Because I know what day this is, they know what day this is, so I was wondering if you know what day this is!
Cedric: Because it's Puerto Rican day.
Bob: Maybe we should stomp you like you stomp the flag! What do you think of that?
Kramer: Now look, I just have one thing to say to you boys. Mama! [runs off screaming]

Rate

 ‘The Puerto Rican Day’ Quotes

Quote from Kramer

Kramer: You want to get outta here? Here's what we do. We leave the car here, we take the plates off, we scratch the serial number off the engine block, and we walk away.
Jerry: Walk away?
Kramer: You've got insurance. You tell them that the car was stolen, and then you get another one free.
Jerry: Isn't there a deductible?
Kramer: All right, what is your deductible?
Jerry: I don't know.
Kramer: Yes, because they've already deducted it.
Jerry: From what?
Kramer: The car, which we're leaving. So the net is zero. See you pocket the money, if there is any, and you get a new car.

Quote from Jerry

Mrs. Nyhart: Would you like to see the rest of the apartment, Mister, um--
Jerry: Uh... Varnsen. Kel Varnsen. Actually, this room intrigues me. Why is it called the TV room?
Mrs. Nyhart: Well, it's--
Jerry: [at TV] Balk?! How was that a balk?! You have any snacks?
Mrs. Nyhart: Mr. Varnsen, if you like the apartment, I should tell you I've also had some interest from a wealthy industrialist.
Jerry: Not Pennypacker.
Mrs. Nyhart: You know him?
Jerry: I wish I didn't. Brace yourself, madam, for an all-out bidding war. But this time, advantage Varnsen!

Quote from Kramer

Mrs. Nyhart: Did the broker send you over?
Kramer: Uh, yes, most likely. Yes. I'm, uh, H.E. Pennypacker. I'm a wealthy industrialist and philanthropist and, uh, a bicyclist. Yes, I'm looking for a place where I can settle down with my, uh, peculiar habits, and, uh, the women that I frequent with. [sniffs wall] Mmm. Mombasa, hmm?
Mrs. Nyhart: The asking price is $1.5 million.
Kramer: Oh, I spend that much on after shave. Yes, I buy and sell men like myself every day. Now, I assume that there's a waterfall grotto?
Mrs. Nyhart: No.
Kramer: How about a bathroom?
Mrs. Nyhart: It has 4.
Kramer: Yes, and where would the absolute nearest one be?
Mrs. Nyhart: Just down the hall.
Kramer: Oh, thank you.