Jerry Quote #1705

Quote from Jerry in The Dealership

Jerry: Hey, Elaine, have you noticed your boyfriend has developed an annoying little habit?
Elaine: The squinting?
Jerry: No.
Elaine: The staring?
Jerry: No. He keeps asking me to give him a high-five.
Elaine: I thought all guys do that.
Jerry: Slapping hands is the lowest form of male primate ritual. In fact, even some of them have moved on. They're using sign language now.
Elaine: It'ss that bad?
Jerry: What do you think the Nazis were doing? That was the heil-five.
Elaine: Isn't that from your act, like, ten years ago?
Jerry: It was a good bit in the '80s, and it's still relatable today.

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 ‘The Dealership’ Quotes

Quote from George

George: When are they gonna have the flying cars, already?
Jerry: Yeah, they have been promising that for a while.
George: Years. When we were kids, they made it seem like it was right around the corner.
Jerry: I think Ed Begley Jr. has one.
George: No. That's just electric.
Jerry: What about Harrison Ford? He had one in, uh, Blade Runner. That was a cool one.
George: Well, what's the competition, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang?
Jerry: Well, what do you think the big holdup is?
George: The government is very touchy about us being in the air. Let us run around on the ground as much as we want. Anything in the air is a big production.
Jerry: Yeah, right. And what about the floating cities?
George: And the underwater bubble cities?
Jerry: It's like we're living in the '50s here.

Quote from David Puddy

Jerry: So, Puddy, this is a pretty good move for you, huh? No more "grease monkey".
David Puddy: I don't care for that term.
Jerry: Oh. Sorry, I didn't know.
David Puddy: No, I don't know too many monkeys who could take apart a fuel injector.
Jerry: I saw one once that could do sign language.
David Puddy: Yeah, I saw that one. Uh... Koko.
Jerry: Yeah, Koko.
David Puddy: Right, Koko. That chimp's all right. High-five.

Quote from George

Jerry: I told you, Puddy's getting me an insider deal.
George: Since when is Elaine's boyfriend selling cars? I thought he was a mechanic.
Jerry: I guess he graduated.
George: That's an easy move. Go from screwing you behind your back to screwing you right to your face.
Jerry: [Kramer honks the horn] Thank you!
George: Puddy's just gonna give you the car, huh? You'll see. First they stick you with the undercoating, rust-proofing, dealer prep. Suddenly, you're on your back like a turtle.
Jerry: All right. Calm down.
George: My father had a car salesman buddy. He was gonna fix him up real nice. Next thing I know, I'm getting dropped of in a Le Car with a fabric sunroof. All the kids are shouting at me, "Hey, Le George! Bonjour, Le George! Let's stuff Le George in Le Locker!"