George Quote #1251
Quote from George in The Bizarro Jerry
George: You know, if I told my engagement story to that receptionist, but told her this was my fiancee...
Jerry: What?
George: Don't you see? Women like that are like members of a secret tribe living in a forbidden city. People like me have not been inside in thousands of years. But with this, it's like I've already been with one of her own. My hand's been stamped. I come and go as I please.
Elaine: Well, you've cracked it. I warned the queen you were getting close and, now it looks like we're gonna have to move the whole damn forbidden city.
George: Can I keep this?
Elaine: No, I need it.
George: Thanks.
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Bizarro Jerry’ Quotes
Quote from Kramer
Kramer: Breakfast. I gotta be in at Brandt-Leland by 9.
Jerry: Why?
Kramer: Because I'm working there, that's why.
Jerry: How long have I been asleep? What year is it?
Kramer: Look, Jerry, I don't know if you've noticed, but lately I've been drifting aimlessly.
Jerry: Now that you mention it...
Kramer: But I finally realized what's missing in my life. Structure. And at Brandt-Leland, I'm getting things done. And I love the people I'm working with.
Jerry: How much are they paying you?
Kramer: No, no, no. I don't want any pay. I'm doing this just for me.
Jerry: Clearly. So, what do you do down there all day?
Kramer: TCB. You know, taking care of business. I gotta go. I'll see you tonight. Forget my briefcase.
Jerry: Well, what do you got in there?
Kramer: Crackers.
Quote from George
Jerry: All right, how about this? Let's say you're abducted by aliens.
George: Fine.
Jerry: They haul you aboard the mothership, take you back to their planet as a curiosity. Now, would you rather be in their zoo or their circus?
George: I gotta go zoo. I feel like I could set more of my own schedule.
Jerry: In the circus, you get to ride on the train, see the whole planet.
George: I'm wearing a little hat. I'm jumping through fire. Putting their little alien heads in my mouth.
Jerry: At least it's show business.
George: Yeah. But in the zoo, you know, they might put a woman in there with me... to, you know, get me to mate.
Jerry: What if she's got no interest in you?
George: Then I'm pretty much where I am right now. Just got to take a ride on a spaceship.
Quote from Jerry
Elaine: I had to ask Kevin to leave his office and come and pick me up.
Jerry: Well, what are friends for?
Elaine: Yes. And he is a friend, Jerry. He's reliable, he's considerate, he's like your exact opposite.
Jerry: So he's Bizarro Jerry.
Elaine: Bizarro Jerry?
Jerry: Yeah, like Bizarro Superman. Superman's exact opposite who lives in the backwards Bizarro World. Up is down, down is up. He says hello when he leaves, goodbye when he arrives.
Elaine: Shouldn't he say "badbye"? Isn't that the opposite of goodbye?
Jerry: No, it's still goodbye.
Elaine: Does he live underwater?
Jerry: No.
Elaine: Is he black?
Jerry: Look, just forget the whole thing, all right?