Jerry Quote #978
Quote from Jerry in The Hamptons
Jerry: Well, George and Jane should be almost there by now.
Elaine: Oh, isn't that weird that George and Jane haven't had sex yet, but they're spending the weekend together?
Jerry: I know, George is pretty pleased about it. It's like she signed a letter of intent.
Elaine: When's Rachel coming out?
Jerry: She's making the three o'clock train.
Elaine: Her father is so religious, I'm just amazed that he's letting you see her again after that Schindler's List make-out session.
Jerry: I bought him some kishka.
Kramer: What's that?
Jerry: It's kind of a stuffed meat thing. Israeli soldiers carry it in case they're captured behind enemy lines. They eat it and it kills them.
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Hamptons’ Quotes
Quote from Jerry
[stand-up:]
Jerry: I find the human fascination with water is amazing. We're constantly going to beaches, pools, lakes, rivers. We're swimming, we're snorkeling, we're scuba-diving. We bathe in it. Our bodies are mostly made of water. Everyone's carrying around these bottles of water. It's like we can't get enough water. Unless it rains, then we're like, "Oh, look. I'm soaked. I am literally drenched." For some reason, we have a huge problem with small, flying water. It'll just stop us right in our tracks. "I felt a drop. We're gonna get caught in it! Everyone cover your water bottles. Run!"
Quote from George
Rachel: Strange man.
Jerry: Wait'll you get to know him.
Rachel: So where is this baby, anyway?
Jerry: Oh, check it out. I guarantee you've never seen anything quite so objectionable. It's down the hall, third door on your left.
[Rachel walks in on George as he's changing his swim suit]
Rachel: Oh, my God! I'm sorry, I thought this was the baby's room. [chuckles] I'm really sorry.
George: I was in the pool! I was in the pool!
Quote from George
George: What if she discusses it with Jane?
Jerry: Oh, she's not gonna tell Jane.
George: How do you know?
Jerry: Women aren't like us.
George: They're worse! They're much worse than us, they talk about everything! Couldn't you at least tell her about the shrinkage factor?
Jerry: No, I'm not gonna tell her about your shrinkage. Besides, I think women know about shrinkage.
George: How do women know about shrinkage?
Jerry: Isn't it common knowledge?