Jerry Quote #928
Quote from Jerry in The Stand-In
Fulton: Hey Jerry, good to see you. I could really use a good laugh.
Jerry: Who couldn't.
Fulton: I haven't cracked a smile in months.
Jerry: Oh, don't worry, you'll crack. Cracking's inevitable. First you crac, then you chuckle. That was the motto with the Russians at the siege of Leningrad. First you crack, then you chuckle. [Fulton has a blank expression] You know, because Leningrad when the Nazis attacked, it wasn't a very happy time... because of the war. Famine. Plus it was cold, very cold. They were eating each other. [still nothing] Maybe this isn't a good time for a visit.
Fulton: No, it's a fine time.
Jerry: Oh, all right. Ah well, there's a priest, a minister and a rabbi, and they're all skydiving.
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Stand-In’ Quotes
Quote from George
George: I didn't even know Fulton was in the hospital.
Jerry: Could use a good laugh. You know what kind of pressure that is? Come on, come with me.
George: Nah, no. I'm not good in these situations. I can't hide my pity. I.. I make 'em feel worse.
Jerry: Oh, stop it.
George: Yeah. And also, I'm afraid that people in that state are finally going to tell me what they really think of me. You know, they got nothing to lose. What do they care?
Quote from Elaine
Jerry: Why, what happened?
Elaine: Let's see. How shall I put this?
Jerry: Well, just put it.
Elaine: He took it out.
Jerry: He what?
Elaine: He took... [blows on her glasses] It out.
Jerry: He took what out?
Elaine: It.
Jerry: He took it out?
Elaine: Yes, sirree, Bob.
Quote from Kramer
Jerry: Fulton's wife told me it's all my fault. She said since my visit, he's taken a turn for the worse.
Kramer: Did you tell him the Pachyderm story?
Jerry: Yes, I told him the Pachyderm story!
Kramer: Maybe I ought to go over there.
Jerry: Towards what end?
Kramer: I'm very good with sick people. They love me. When my friend Len Nicodemo had the gout, I moved into his hospital room for three days. The doctors were amazed at his recovery.