Kramer Quote #378
Quote from Kramer in The Conversion
Kramer: Um, you wanted to see me, Father?
Older Priest: Yes. Please, sit down. Sister Roberta came to see me yesterday.
Kramer: I know what this is about, Father. Now, I didn't do anything. I just spoke to her innocently for just a few minutes. It's just that, that I have this power.
Older Priest: Yes. Kavorka.
Kramer: Kavorka?
Older Priest: It is a Latvian word which means "the lure of the animal".
Kramer: I don't understand.
Older Priest: Women are drawn to you. They would give anything to be possessed by you.
Kramer: Help me, Father. Help me.
Older Priest: Yes, yes, I will help you. Now, listen very carefully. I want you to buy ten cloves of garlic, three quarts of vinegar, six ounces…
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Conversion’ Quotes
Quote from George
George: I can't believe how easy it is. I'm virtually Orthodox. All I have to do is read a few books, memorize a few prayers, and I'm in the club.
Jerry: That's all there is to it?
George: That's all there is to it. By Christmas day, I will be Brother Costanza.
Jerry: And what is Brother Costanza planning on telling Mother Costanza?
George: Brother Costanza will be taking the vow of silence.
Quote from George
Older Priest: I must say, George, I was somewhat surprised at the results of your conversion test. I don't recall having seen such an impressive performance. You truly must be filled with the spirit of the Lord.
George: Oh, I'm... I'm full of it, Father.
Quote from Jerry
[stand-up:]
Jerry: You know, doctor is supposed to be such a prestigious occupation. But it’s really like one of the only jobs where you have to have your diploma right up there on the wall. It makes them seem so insecure, doesn't it? "I really am a doctor, you know. You think I'm not, just check it out." I mean, I don't know why they need these little bits of psychological leverage over us all the time. "Go in that little room, take your pants off, wait 15 minutes, and then I'll give you my opinion." I mean, after that, anyone that comes in with pants on seems like they know what they’re talking about. In any difference of opinion, pants always beats no-pants.