Jerry Quote #805
Jerry: I don't know why he asked me to be godfather. We're not even that close of friends. All because we're on the softball team... I'm the pitcher, he's the catcher, he thinks we have a special relationship?
Elaine: I thought pitchers and catchers did have a special rapport.
Jerry: Well, maybe in hardball, with all the signals, but I'm just lobbing it in. We don't have conferences. He doesn't come out to the mound and encourage me.
Elaine: What about me? I mean, I just watched a few games with her in the stands.
Jerry: Don't they have any closer friends? They're level-jumping on our friendship.
Elaine: Yes, it is level-jumping.
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Bris’ Quotes
Quote from Kramer
Kramer: Hey, I just saw a pig-man. A pig-man. He was sleeping, and then he woke up and he looked at me... and he made this horrible sound, this [squeals].
George: Kramer, what are you talking about?
Kramer: I'm talking about a pig-man. I walked in the wrong room, and there he was.
George: A pig-man?
Kramer: A pig-man. Half pig, half man.
Quote from Kramer
Kramer: Hey, we're not talking about a manicure. Imagine, this is gonna be his first memory... of his parents just standing there while some stranger, [chopping noise], cuts off a piece of his manhood and then serves a catered lunch. [Myra starts crying]
Stan: Myra?
Kramer: She'll be okay.
Quote from Kramer
Kramer: Don't ever question my instincts, because my instincts are honed. Look at that. Look, look.
Jerry: What now? "Hospital receives grant to conduct DNA research. Government funds genetic research at area hospital." Yeah, so?
Kramer: Pig-man, baby, pig-man.
Elaine: If I have to hear about this pig-man one more time...
Kramer: Hey, I'm telling you, the pig-man is alive. The government has been experimenting with pig-men since the '50s.
Jerry: Oh, will you stop it? Just because the hospital's conducting DNA research doesn't mean they're creating mutant pig-men.
Kramer: Jerry, will you wake up to reality? It's a military thing. They're probably creating a whole army of pig warriors.