Kramer Quote #286

Quote from Kramer in The Handicap Spot

Kramer: Well, the handicapped woman? I went to see her.
Elaine: You went to see her?
Kramer: Yeah.
Jerry: Wow, what happened?
Kramer: I'm in love.
Jerry: What?
Kramer: Yeah, she is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I love her, Jerry. I mean, I really love her. I'm gonna ask her to marry me. She's got everything I've always wanted in another human being. Except for the walking.
Jerry: Oh, what's the difference, you don't go out that much.

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 ‘The Handicap Spot’ Quotes

Quote from Kramer

Kramer: It's over!
Jerry: What's over?
Kramer: Me and Lola.
George: The woman we bought the wheelchair for?
Kramer: Yeah, she dumped me!
Jerry: She dumped you?
Kramer: She dumped me! She rolled right over me! Said I was a hipster-dufus. Am I a hipster-dufus?
Jerry & George: No.
Kramer: Said I'm not good looking enough for her. Not good looking! Jerry, look at me. Look at my
face, huh, am I beautiful? George, am I beautiful?
George: ... You're very attractive.
Kramer: Yeah. She says she doesn't wanna see me again. Told me to drop dead!

Quote from Kramer

Kramer: Boy, that's a nice triangle.
Jerry: It's isosceles
Kramer: Ooh, isosceles. I love the name Isosceles. You know, if I had a kid, I would name him Isosceles. Isosceles Kramer.

Quote from Jerry

[stand-up:]
Jerry: I have a friend who is about to get married, they're having the bachelor party and the bridal shower on the same day. So it's conceivable that while she's getting the lingerie, he'll be at a nude bar watching a table dancer wearing the same outfit. That is possible. But to me, the difference between being single and being married, is the form of government. You see, when you're single, you are the dictator of your own life. I have complete power. When I give the order to fall asleep on the sofa with the TV on in the middle of the day, no-one can overrule me! When you're married, you're part of a vast decision-making body. Before anything gets done there are meetings. Committees have to study the situation. And this is if the marriage works. That's what's so painful about divorce: you've been impeached and you weren't even the president!