Jerry Quote #399
Quote from Jerry in The Fix-Up
[stand-up:]
Jerry: The problem with the condom is still buying them. I think we should have, like, a secret signal with the druggist. That you just walk into the drugstore, you go up to the counter, he looks at you and if you go like this... [nods] He puts them in the bag for you, that's it. You show up there, you put your little shaving cream, your little toothpaste, you know, "How are you today?" [nods] "Have a nice day." "You too."
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Fix-Up’ Quotes
Quote from George
George: I mean it's gotten to the point where I'm flirting with operators on the phone. I almost made a date with one.
Jerry: Oh, so there's still hope.
George: I don't want hope. Hope is killing me. My dream is to become hopeless. When you're hopeless, you don't care, and when you don't care, that indifference makes you attractive.
Jerry: Oh, so hopelessness is the key.
George: It's my only hope.
Quote from Elaine
Elaine: So what'd you do last night?
Jerry: Went out with George. You?
Elaine: Went out with Cynthia.
Jerry: How was it? What'd you talk about?
Elaine: Well, you know, the usual. The Federal Reserve, the rainforest. Cynthia thought we should nuke the rainforest. You know, get rid of it in one fell swoop so we can at least eliminate it as a subject of conversation.
Quote from George
George: What kind of hair?
Jerry: You know, long dark hair.
George: Flowing?
Jerry: Flowing?
George: Is it flowing? I like flowing, cascading hair. Thick lustrous hair is very important to me. [scratches his balding head]
Jerry: "Thick lustrous hair is very important to me," is that what you said?
George: Yeah, that's right.
Jerry: Just clarifying.