[stand-up:]
Jerry: The transplant, the hair plug is an interesting procedure. It really is quite amazing. Hair that was on your shower soap yesterday, could be in your head tomorrow. How did they do the first transplant? Did they have the guy take a shower, get his soap, rush it in there by helicopter, you know, keep the soap alive on the soap support system? They eventually move it other. "We got the hairs but I think we lost the Zest." Sometimes the body rejects the transplant with organs. Is it possible that a head could reject the hair transplant? The guy's just standing there and suddenly... Bink! It lands in someone's frozen yogurt.

Elaine: So did you hear this message?
George: Oh. [chuckles] It was unbelievable
Elaine: Really?
George: Yeah. I can't get over it.
Elaine: Huh! Sexy?
George: This woman drove us out of our minds.
Elaine: Like, uh, how did she sound?
George: She had this throaty, sexy kind of whisper.
Elaine: Really? Like uh... Like uh... [leans over and whispers to George] Jerry, I want to slide my tongue around you like a snake. [moans]
George: Oh, my God! You?! You?! That was you! How did you-
Elaine: I stopped at the club to see him, and I was standing in the back while he was on, right? And there was this tape recorder there and I... got this impulse. [laughs]

George: Excuse me. Do you speak Chinese?
Ping: Chinese? Yeah.
George: Oh, look. Um, I'm on with Beijing at the hair restoration clinic. Um, could you talk to them for me and tell them I'd like to place an order?
Ping: [talks in Mandarin, laughs]
George: They got a billion people over there. He found a relative.
Ping: [to George] If you send money they send cream.
George: They send me? Aw right. Ask them, does it really work?
Ping: They say you grow hair. Look like Stalin.
George: Ask them, are there any side effects?
Ping: Impotence. [laughs]
George: Aw! Funny. He's a funny guy.
Ping: Get a money order from the Bank of China. Be here three days after they get check.
[As an excited George walks off, Ping sits down and continues the phone call while perusing a magazine]
Ping: [talks in Mandarin]
Jerry: Excuse me. [Ping looks up] Kind of an expensive call.