Jerry Quote #97
Quote from Jerry in The Jacket
[stand-up:]
Jerry: I hate clothes, okay? I hate buying them. I hate picking them out of my closet. I can't stand every day trying to come up with little outfits for myself. I think eventually fashion won't even exist. It won't. I think eventually we'll all be wearing the same thing. 'cause anytime I see a movie or a TV show where there's people from the future of another planet, they're all wearing the same thing. Somehow they've decided, "This is going to be our outfit. One-piece silver jumpsuit, V-stripe, and boots. That's it." We should come up for an outfit for earth. An earth outfit. We should vote on it. Candidates propose different outfits, no speeches. They walk out, twirl, walk off. We just sit in the audience and go, "That was nice. I could wear that."
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Jacket’ Quotes
Quote from Elaine
Jerry: Where have you been?!
Elaine: Kramer! That Kramer! I'm just about to leave, he calls me up. He begs me to sit in his car for two minutes, so he can pick up these birds.
Jerry: Oh, you didn't!
Elaine: Well, he said he'd drive me here right after. So, I am sitting in his car twenty minutes! He doesn't come down. I am freezing. Then a cop comes by, tells me to get out of the car. He's a city marshal. He's towing the car away. Kramer owes thousands of dollars in back tickets. He was going to tow it with me in the car! So, they tow the car. Now, I am standing outside, and I am freezing, but I cannot leave because I have to tell him what happened to the car. So, finally, he finally comes down with his giant cage filled with doves. He said he was getting special instructions, that each dove has a different diet. So, we're wandering around trying to get a cab, when two of these doves fly out! Now we're running down the street after these doves. I almost got hit by a bus. [sits down, takes a deep breath]
Quote from Jerry
Jerry: I think I've seen enough.
Salesman: Well, I might have something in the back.
Elaine: The back? They never find anything in the back. If they had anything good in the back, they'd put it out in the front.
Jerry: Why don't they open up an entire store for the back? Call it, "Just Back." All back. No front. You walk in the front, you're immediately in the back.
Quote from Jerry
[stand-up:]
Jerry: I had a leather jacket that got ruined. Now, why does moisture ruin leather? I don't get this. Aren't cows outside most of the time? I don't understand this. When it's raining do cows go up to the farmhouse, "Let us in, we're all wearing leather! Open the door! We're gonna ruin the whole outfit here." "Is it suede?" "I am suede, the whole thing is suede, I can't have this cleaned. It's all I got!"