George: I'd like to report a problem with one of your mechanics.
Willie: When did you bring the car in?
George: [scoffs] Yeah, right. I'm gonna get my car repaired at a dealership. Why don't I just flush my money down the toilet?
Willie: Sir, what, exactly, is the problem?
George: One of your guys - Kip, or Ned, short name - stole my Twix candy bar.
Willie: Are you saying he grabbed the candy bar away from you?
George: He might as well have. I caught him, and his face was covered in chocolate and cookie crumbs.
Willie: I thought you said it was a Twix.
George: Oh, it was. But he claimed it was a 5th Avenue bar.
Willie: Maybe it was.
George: Oh, no, no. Twix is the only candy with the cookie crunch.
Willie: What about the $100,000 bar?
George: No. Rice and caramel.
Willie: Nougat?
George: No.
Willie: Positive?
George: Please.
Assistant: You know they changed the name from $100,000 bar to 100 Grand?
George: All I want is my seventy-five cents back, an apology, and for him to be fired!