Quote from George in The Abstinence
Jerry: Where have you been? You know, you're on next. George: I got lost on the way over. Jerry: Got lost? We went to school here for three years. George: What are these? [holds test tubes to his head like antennae) Take me to your leader. Jerry: Oh, my God. You had sex! You had sex with Louise! George: No, the Portuguese waitress. Jerry: The Portuguese waitress? George: I calculated my odds of ever getting together with a Portuguese waitress. Mathematically, I had to do it, Jerry.