[stand-up:]
Jerry: The Christmas tree certainly seems to inspire a love-hate relationship. All that time is spent selecting it and decorating it, and then a week after, it's just thrown somewhere. You see it by the side of the road, it looks like a mob hit. The car slows down, the door opens, and this tree just rolls out. People snap out of that Christmas spirit like it was a drunken stupor. They just wake up one morning and go, "Oh, my God. There's a tree inside the house. Just throw it anywhere."