[stand-up:]
Jerry: Does it seem to you that the ventriloquist dummy has a very active sexual, social life? He's always talking about dates and women he knows, and bringing them back to the suitcase at night. There's always a sawdust joke in there somewhere, you know. He says kinky things because he's made out of wood, and he can spin his head around. We're somehow expected to believe because the face is so animated that they think we're not noticing that the feet are just swinging there. The dummy feet never look really right, do they? They're just kind of dangling there. Always kind of askew, you know. You always just a see an ankle, you know. Those little thin, fabric ankles that they have, you know. I don't think this thing is real.