Carla: Why aren't you out on the beach?
Turk: Because Daddy came to seduce you. But for me to get my sexy mode, I'm gonna need you to take off the hat and stop picking your toes. [grimaces and groans] It's alright, I'll push through it. Baby, look. Izzy's not here. And this is the Bahamas. The islands of making love. You, me, the ocean. Underwater relations.
Carla: Lead the way. [cellphone rings] That's the nanny. This'll just take a second.
Turk: Okay. It's cool. I'm gonna head down to the water. It'll be just like our honeymoon. Nobody will see what we're doing except for the mermaids.
Carla: Baby, for the last time, mermaids aren't real.
Turk: I know what I saw, woman!

Turk: Baby, you know why I love the Bahamas? They got brothers on the money, check it. Don't that look like Uncle Dottie?

Elliot: Here you go, Sammy. I know I was supposed to drop Sam off in daycare, but the only other kid there was a creepy little girl with freckles.
J.D.: Please don't give my son your prejudice of redheads.
Elliot: They're god's mistakes, J.D., accept it.