Turk: Carla doesn't want the prosthetic. I do.
J.D.: Why would you lie?
Turk: Sometimes, you say you're doing something for someone else when you really want to do it for yourself.
J.D.: I get it. Maybe that's what Elliot's doing.
Dr. Cox: What in the hell are you talking about?
J.D.: Oh, I'm just doing this thing where I use a slice of wisdom from someone else's life to solve a problem in my own life.
Jordan: Seems coincidental.
J.D.: And yet I do it almost every week.

Janitor: Ted, what are you doing?
Ted: I'm bringing a cup of coffee to Dr. Cox.
Janitor: Why? That's not your job. Come on. You got a fresh start here. You going to stick to the same dynamic you had with Dr. Kelso? Remember how that started?
[flashback to a full-haired Ted meeting Dr. Kelso:]
Ted: Hi, Dr. Kelso. Theodore Buckland, licensed attorney.
Dr. Kelso: Ted, before you get started, and trust me, I hate asking this, would you mind doing me one tiny, little, non-work-related favor?
Ted: No problem, man.
[later, Ted is cleaning the bumper of Kelso's car with a toothbrush]
Dr. Kelso: Make sure you get the backside of that grill. I hit the neighbor's cat last night. Quick little bastard. I had to cross two lanes to get him.

Carla: I am not being ridiculous. To be safe, I'm going to line your boxers with bubble wrap.
Turk: Esta loca.
Carla: Look. We haven't talked about whether we want another kid, and if something happened... I just don't that decision to be made for us.
Turk: No decision's been made.
Carla: Are you sure?
Turk: I know there's only one down there, but he's the better one. He's like Tina Turner after she left Ike. Stronger, more confident, and is going to have a very successful solo career.