J.D. Quote #1577
Quote from J.D. in My Dumb Luck
J.D.: [v.o.] Dr. Cox had a patient that he hadn't been able to diagnose for two years. And he was back again.
Dr. Cox: Look, Alex, I'm afraid I still don't know what's causing all of this, so I'm gonna go ahead and treat your heart palpitations with beta blockers.
J.D.: [v.o.] Turk and I couldn't resist play the little game called "poke the bear".
J.D.: Turk, yesterday I had this patient I just could not diagnose.
Turk: Wow, you must have felt like a real jackass.
J.D.: I did feel like a jackass, but then I was able to figure out what was wrong with him, because I'm not a jackass, I'm a good doctor.
J.D.: [v.o.] Okay, now just stay calm, so he doesn't know what you're up to. Oh, no, Turk's breaking. Quick, distract the bear with a casual greeting.
J.D.: Oh, hey Dr. Cox, how are things? [Dr. Cox walks away] My God, that was amazing. I never felt so alive in my whole life.
Turk: My heart stopped for a second.
J.D.: We made it. I love you, man.
Turk: I love you too. [they hug]
J.D.: You smell like an athlete.
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Dumb Luck’ Quotes
Quote from Dr. Kelso
Dr. Kelso: So, have you killed anyone yet?
Boon: What? No.
Dr. Kelso: Well, you will.
Boon: Super.
Dr. Kelso: It's a rite of passage for doctors. If you're lucky, it'll be a patient who's on his way out anyway. My first kill was a 19-year-old girl. She came in with severe abdominal pain. I thought it was appendicitis. Turned out, she was pregnant and didn't know it. It was ectopic and she was bleeding internally. I should have checked for that. But by the time I discovered my mistake, it was too late. Sometimes I look at this old hospital, I actually see the faces of all the patients I've lost. Booga, booga, booga!
Boon: Aah!
Dr. Kelso: [laughs] Priceless. But I do see them sometimes.
Quote from Dr. Kelso
Board Member: Well, Bob, your employees really stood by you. They pointed out to the board that-
Mr. Mandelbaum: Hey.
Board Member: Well, you run a tight ship. And actually, we'd like you to stay on.
Dr. Kelso: Girls, thank you for saving my job. The one thing I wanted was to end things on my own terms, and since you're letting me, you can shove it up your ass, Rodney. I'm out of here.
[Dr. Kelso takes the portrait of himself]
Dr. Kelso: I'm taking this with me, dammit. Thanks for everything, Ted. Sincerely.
Ted: You're welcome, sir.
Elliot: I'm wonder if he even cared about this place at all.
Boon: Yeah. He did.
Quote from Janitor
Janitor: Okay, I'll support Kelso. But in return, I want you to put me in a full body cast and take me to the airport. I'll explain later.
Carla: Why would we do that?
Janitor: Because I'm the bigger's mover/shaker in this dump. Come on.
Elliot: You handle this. And be nice.
Carla: All right. Are you familiar with the term "delusions of grandeur"?
Janitor: I believe I coined that term. Look, I'm a simple, unassuming janitor who can control people's actions with his mind. Observe. Explode! If that would have worked, it would have freaked you out. You'd have loved it! Fall. [an elderly person falls over] Hello?