J.D.: It's not like nurses know everything.
J.D.: [v.o.] Uh-oh. Carla's gearing up to explode. Save yourself. Attempt the casual side-switch. And you're there. Now angry at Kelso.
J.D.: Bob, how dare you?
Carla: Exactly. You're worried about what I can handle? Vascular Surgery wants an update every two hours on bed 1, I'm weaning Mrs. Jones' dopamine from ten mikes to five, Mrs. Meyerson's abdominal wound is dehiscing and Mr. Wilder is turfed to Psych because he thinks he's Flo from Alice.
Mr. Wilder: Kiss my grits!
Carla: Exactly, Flo! Exactly!
J.D.: I hope you learned something today.

Dr. Marston: Stress is often a factor in conception. So tell me, do you think stress might be an issue?
[flashback:]
Carla: I swear, if you don't knock me up tonight, there's no more sex until you steal me a baby. So do it right this time.
[present:]
Turk: There's a little stress.

J.D.: [v.o.] Now that Elliot and Keith were serious, she started buying him gifts.
Keith: [laughs] It's a mouth harp! Oh, awesome!
J.D.: [v.o.] Keith was shockingly good at pretending to like crappy presents. But you know what he was best at?
J.D.: Keith, we need more popcorn, yeah.
J.D.: [v.o.] Being girl bait. Here's how it goes down. Keith comes back, Elliot marks her territory so the girls know he's taken, and I just pick off one of the smaller, weaker ones that comes by for a look-see.
J.D.: I'm a doctor. I'm a landowner. Burt Reynolds is my father. I love sports. [empties bowl] Keith, more popcorn.